Life is a Bowl of Wedgies

Saying Yes to God

2012-02-18T19:56:00.001-08:00

On my left side bar is a picture of a family with four children and it’s titled “Four for One: Please Pray”. I stumbled on Emily Wierenga’s blog about a year ago and have been moved by the work of Christ in and through her. She battled anorexia for years and she speaks out about her story and how God really saved her life and now she encourages others in the same struggle she once had. Emily is an amazing artist too. Her work is beautiful and her words so fresh. She talks about the miracle and blessing of having two precious little boys. The youngest I think is less than a year old. And right as they were savoring their two precious little ones God throws a curve ball to them. You’ll have to go over and read more about it here and here. But in a nutshell, they are increasing their family by two boys. Two boys of a young Mother who needs the Body of Christ to help her during a difficult time. And that’s what Emily and her husband have done. They have taken in these boys as their own for a 10 month time period. So if I’m reading correctly they have four boys under the age of four. And this would be why they are asking for prayer. Prayer for their sanity while raising these boys, prayer for Emily while she writes a book and prayer for the Mom of these boys.

My heart is left wondering what I would do in a situation like this. If a young Mom asked me to parent her children for a temporary time and I felt like God was in it would I do it. That would be so very hard….even if God wrote it on a post-it-note. That’s my hang up sometimes. I’m like, “If God could just write it on a post-it-note and tell me what He wants me to do then I’d totally do it.” But even if this directive came from God on a post-it-note written out so very legibly, I’m thinking I could see myself saying something like, “God, are you sure that’s your handwriting?” I mean seriously think about the ramifications of what this family is doing. This is huge. Think about the times when you might have your kids’ best friends for the weekend. These are kids they play with all the time and even so by the end of the weekend you’re ready to have your family back. And then shift that picture to a week, a month, ten months. Wow, what a heart for God. What identification with Christ. What love that flows through this family. This is what church looks like. Should look like. I don’t know that I’m there and I long to be. I want to think that if I was called on by God, even if my hand wasn’t raised and even if I was hiding behind the person in front of me, that I’d say Yes to him. So I guess while I’m practicing my “yes’s” to God I will also be praying for this precious family who is living out a particularly difficult “Yes”. And I’d like to ask that you pray for them too. Swing by Emily’s place and let her know you’re praying for her or even leave a prayer in her comments or you can do it here if you’d like. This is what the Body of Christ looks like …..you and I can have a part in this family’s life by praying. It’s quite honestly the best gift they could receive. It sounds like their local church is pitching in and helping out as well. That just excites me! This is why the church is so special. God designed us to need Him solely but to need each other as well. And when we step into the unfamiliar, the scary, the less desirable all for the sake of Christ then we prove ourselves to be his children, to be walking in the light and to be a healthy part of the Body of Christ.

Bless you Emily and your family. I am praying for you and your all your boys.

Crazy Socks and Sweet Words Overheard

2012-02-14T20:29:00.001-08:00

Valentines’ Day was fun today. We had several things going on but we did squeeze in some goodies for the kids. Mitchell got a Star Wars transformer and some candy…..

And Sophie racked up too but my favorite was these fun socks she got. It reminded me how much I have always loved crazy socks. I sort of have a thing for crazy socks. My favorite ones are my “bite me” socks that my friend gave me years ago. When I’m feeling sort of sassy I’ll whip out my bite-me socks that sport a half eaten apple. And what about those bright multi colored striped toe socks that I think everyone in the 80’s owned. …..

They were so hot (as in sweaty feet not sexy feet) and my feet always had hot flashes but I wore them anyways. If you were totally insane you’d wear your Mork n Mindy suspenders with them. Oh yeah baby, that is so not cool. I never wore the two together. Yes, I really did own a pair of striped suspenders.They had white hands on them that clipped to your pants. Ha! You are totally missing out if you didn’t own either pair but the good news is this: You can still purchase both here and here! So what are you waiting for?

Okay, that’s just weird so I’ll be serious now and give a brief update from the last week.

My in-laws were up towards the end of last week and left today. We had a really good time with them and the kids each got some special time with their Grandparents and I’m so glad they did. Ice cream runs, Dollar Store and Chuck E Cheese all scream, “Grandparents are in town!” We will be in withdrawals the rest of this week but so thankful for the time we had with them.

Sophie has had a hard time going to sleep in her bed ever since watching “Ernest Scared Stupid” – warning label: do not let your children watch this movie unless they are totally secure with horror movies. It wasn’t really a horror movie but we mindlessly let them watch it after seeing Ernest Goes to Camp because we thought it couldn’t be that bad and we vaguely remembered watching it growing up. BIG MISTAKE. Needless to say, Sophie slept on the top bunk in Mitchell’s room tonight and I overheard them talking after we kissed them good night. I heard Sophie say, “You’re a good boy, Mitchell. You’re a good part of this family.” I thought I was going to melt into a huge puddle right outside Mitchell’s room. I walked in and Sophie said, “ I was just telling Mitchell he’s a good boy.” Mitchell said, “Yeah, it’s because I was telling her she really needs to become a Christian but she wants to wait until she’s six years old. Isn’t that cute, Mom?”

And these sweet words make me want to savor this bedtime conversation. Forever.

Oh, and btw, Randy and I do celebrate Valentine’s but we almost always do it a few days before or after Valentine’s. It’s less crowded and sitters are easier to find and no homework for the kids, etc. It just works out better for us where we are right now. But I applaud all those couples who fight for the actual formal Valentine dinner on Valentine’s night. I hope you had a great time!

Sophie’s Recovery

2012-02-07T14:54:00.001-08:00

We are exactly one week into Sophie’s recovery from her tonsillectomy which went really well. She got sick (threw up) while they were putting her to sleep and so they ended up having to suction her stomach and throat which the Dr. said was not the most ideal situation but they took good care of her and she was fine. She had these red marks under her chin that looked like nail marks. The nurse saw me looking at them and said, “Did the Dr. tell you what happened?” I told her that he had and she went on to explain that when a patient gets sick like that and they have to suction their stomach they have to grab them really tight up under the chin to make sure the oxygen goes in. I’m sure there’s a much better way of explaining it but that’s what I heard anyways. I don’t fully understand but it just was a little sobering to see those marks on her and know that she could have aspirated but thank God she didn’t. Anyways, enough about that…..Sophie is doing great! Get this……she wanted to have garlic and olive oil TRISKETS for lunch the day after her surgery. Gives me the weeby jeebies just thinking about that going down. Of course I didn’t let her have them even though the Dr. said there were no limitations on what she could eat: just whatever she felt like eating. He said some patients went home the same day and ate normal and others didn’t eat normal food for two weeks. But just whatever she felt like eating would be fine. So she had popsicles, about ten each day, for the first two days and then she started eating regular food. She slept with me the first five days and that was interesting. I woke up with her foot wrapped around my neck one night. I thought it was her hand until I started stroking her toes. Lovely. My Mom came up from Atlanta to help out and boy was it wonderful having her here. She cooked, cleaned, answered the door, went grocery shopping and just filled in wherever. It was the biggest blessing to have her here. The kids loved having her around and they each got some special time with her. And can I just say that a forty year old still needs her Mamma sometimes? I know….I’m such a baby. At least I admit it. The other really cool thing about Sophie’s week was that she was inundated with care packages, cards and gift certificates to the local ice cream store. I mean you would’ve thought she just got married or something. It was really amazing and sweet how our church family and friends from the school rallied around her during this time. I am really humbled by the gracious care she was extended.

This cute little bear, “Rosie”, is just one of the many gifts Sophie received.

On a very sad side note, our community is grieving the deaths of a very loved and committed couple who were the victims of a home invasion Saturday around 2:00am. They leave behind a college age daughter and a high school aged son. The viewing is tonight and the funeral is tomorrow afternoon. Our school had a special time of prayer for the family this week and will have an early release tomorrow as many of our students know both the children. They attended our school a few years back. So if you think about it please pray for this family and for the peace of God to wash over them in ways they can’t even imagine. That’s my prayer for them.

“More” - A guest post from my father-in-law

2012-02-05T18:34:00.001-08:00

My Father and Mother-in-law serve with a Mission Board as Pastoral Care Givers to their Missionaries. So they travel and counsel, encourage and simply be with Missionaries who are constantly pouring themselves out for the sake of Christ. This is a letter he recently wrote to friends and supporters and it grabbed my heart and I think you’ll be inspired through it as well. His words are in purple.
“I am writing this to a few of my friends (and my favorite daughter-in-law’s blog) concerning my personal theme for 2012. There is no hidden agenda, only to perhaps stimulate you in your personal growth. I am centering on one word and a major emphasis on it in three areas of my life. The word is more, and the three areas of responsibilities in my life that I desire and pray to see this year are: more Christ-like, more generous, and more inviting. I want to be like Christ, shockingly generous, and amazingly inviting. The word “more” suggests change, progress, transformation, growth, and maturity. The Bible teaches of bringing forth “more fruit” in John 15. To the Thessalonians He spoke of their growth and love, which everybody could see already, and said He wanted to see it “more and more”. Don’t be stagnant, comfortable, or satisfied. In Philippians 1:9 here was Paul’s prayer: “that their love would abound more and more”.
To even consider becoming more Christ-like, more generous, and more inviting can be intimidating. I am so far from being Christ-like that this concept could seem unreachable or impossible to ever get there. Why even try? That’s why I want you to know that for me and you, more is all about taking the next step, not about arriving. You know what? I am not able to jump to downtown Atlanta in one week, but I can take a step, then another step, and another step. If I keep taking those steps I will eventually get to my goal. Therefore, for 2012 the focus for me is not arriving, but on taking the next step—the next step to being more Christ-like, more generous, and more inviting than I am today. That is my goal!
Being more Christ-like is to live like Jesus and to love like Jesus. It is God’s desire for all of us, that we be more like Christ. That is what He wants to happen in our lives. A book that had a great impact in my life as a young Christian was,“In His Steps”, by Charles Sheldon. It is based on I Peter 2:21, “For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in His steps . . .” We are told to walk as Jesus did. In other words, live like Him, love like Him. So we must know how Jesus lived and how He loved, and to do that we must spend time regularly in the Bible and DIG. That’s where we learn“HOW” to be Christ-like. Baptize your brain the in Bible—especially the biographies of Jesus: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.
Being more generous is to use all my resources the way God would use them. It is not just money, although generosity certainly has to do with money. Jesus said that what I do with my money is a revelation of my heart . But generosity is using all of my resources—everything that I am, and everything that I have: my possessions, which would include my house, car, clothes, tools, computer, my stove . . . ; my time—and that is a biggie! Then there’s my experiences that have taught me and shaped me; also, my job, friends, family, opportunities. When we think of being more generous we need to think of all our resources. I can be generous or I can be selfish with any of these. I want to be more generous. This is such a crucial trait, for it is an expression of love. Love is the core characteristic of a Christ-follower. Remember, love God and love your neighbor (Matthew 22).
Being more inviting is to be a person who is constantly bringing people to Jesus. It involves who I am, what I’m like, as well as what I say. The early church was Christ-like and their generosity constantly attracted people who wanted to be a part of it. Jesus was generous and boy, was He an inviting Person! The masses wanted to be around Him, to touch Him. People wanted Him at their weddings. Parents wanted Him to hold their children. He was invited over to people’s houses with their friends for dinner.
Do you see a pattern here? Jesus Himself, being Christ, was Christ-like, generous, and inviting. Do you see how they all go together? What steps could we take this week to be more Christ-like, more generous, and more inviting?

Remember, more is about taking the next step, not about arriving.”

This hits home with me because I’m a total step skipper. As a kids I would jump down half a flight of steps and would always skip at least two steps on the way up. Always. Not so much anymore. Ahem. But I do see myself skipping steps and wanting to just “arrive”. I tend to want to conquer and get it over with and go on to the next thing. I’m more about the end results than the process and so this post is great for me. I’m also wanting to be more “inviting” and more generous as explained in this letter.

P.S. Thanks, Dad, for guest posting…..ummm….you don’t mind do you?

Tonsils are coming out

2012-01-29T20:24:00.001-08:00

Sophie is getting her tonsils out on Tuesday morning at 8:15am and I thought I was totally fine with it. Instead, I feel myself getting a bit anxious about the whole thing. And as a result I’ve found myself making some pretty big promises tonight. Already Sophie has milked me for the following:

Sleeping with me in our bed, eating popsicles for breakfast-lunch and dinner, a princess line up (Beauty and the Beast, Little Mermaid, Tangled and the Princess Bride), agreeing to letting her pick every single pansy that we have growing in the front and back yard pots to put in her room for decoration, and letting her take this huge bear with her to the hospital. She got this bear after church today from Mitchell’s sweet Sunday School teacher. Sophie loves this humongous bear and has carried it all over the house with her. Can you picture this thing in the hospital center waiting room? Me neither.

Yep, Mamma’s getting nervous. And when this Mom gets nervous she talks and talks and won’t shut up. Randy put a stop to the big bear going to the hospital even though I told him they said she could bring any stuffed animal she wanted to. And he isn’t so sure about the flowers being picked either. Whew! on that one because I really don’t want to do that but she melted my heart when she pleaded to let her pick all the girls. That’s what she calls them: her little girls. We worked so hard on planting them a few months back and she blessed my soul when she called them her little girls. It was so sweet. So how could I tell her that she couldn’t pick her little girls and put them in vases all around her room? I know, it’s this sort of none sense that turns them into Brats with a capital B. But once in a blue moon is okay, right? We’ll see who wins the flower power deal. Daddy acts tough when she’s not around but if it was him that was listening to her he would’ve totally gone out and picked those dozens of flowers right then. In his underwear. For real. And this is why I’m glad I was the one putting her to bed tonight.

Oh, and one cute Sophie’ism from the weekend. She went with Randy to go pick up 500 donuts at Krispy Kreme for a church event and when they got there Randy decided the two of them would sit down and eat a donut together and call it a date. When he told her this she said, “Oh Daddy, if I had known that I would have put on my dress!”

Awwwwww……GO PICK THOSE FLOWERS HONEY! AND THE NEIGHBOR’S TOO!

I mean it anybody want a peanut?

2012-01-26T19:16:00.001-08:00

This week is our school spirit week and today was dress up as your favorite character. Sophie was a princess. Mitchell was Wesley from “The Princess Bride” and yes, he is wearing my pantyhose as his face mask. My good pantyhose I might add (not that I ever wear them anymore it’s just fun to complain about). Randy made his mask for him five minutes before they had to leave for school. I was pretty impressed. Mitchell was proud of it too. Tonight while Randy and Mitch were at the table working on homework I came down the stairs in my one legged black pantyhose and a long tee shirt and said, “Has anyone seen my other pantyhose leg?” He put out a snort laugh and then said, “MOM, a girl in my class figured it out at the end of the day. I was so embarrassed!” Then it was my turn to snort laugh. The Princess Bride is one of those movies that we’re emotionally attached to because when Randy and I were dating this was one of our favorite movies. We mocked all the famous lines for decades after and now our kids do the same. We bought the movie a few years back and we just love it.

We’d appreciate your prayers for Sophie as she gets her tonsils taken out on Tuesday morning. She had her adenoids out when she was three and they didn’t take her tonsils out at that time because of the extra time under sedation it would require. So here we are doing another surgery less than two years later. I hate it for her but her ENT feels we need to do it and we are ready to try this for her overall health sake. We are praying this will really help her. It made a huge difference for Mitchell when his were taken out at five years old. He never had a sick appointment afterwards. He had a lot of throat infections prior to his tonsillectomy. So please pray with us that God will protect her, give her peace leading up to it (she’s very anxious about it), a smooth recovery and that the results will be positive. Thank you in advance for praying for Sophie.

She got these balloons at the hospital when she had a CT scan of her sinuses done this week. She was scared of the machine and crying and some guy who worked there gave them to her. So sweet. She was beyond thrilled. She also had to get blood work done. Pooh! But she got some good stuff out of it all: toy at the dollar store, cinnamon roll at McDonalds and got to choose where to eat lunch out. So she did pretty good in the end.

The next random picture is of Randy and Mitchell getting busted playing Sophie’s princess Wii game. They love it. Oh well, what can you do. I think it’s hilarious. They claim to have just been setting it up for Sophie and her BFF. Mmm-hum.

Dog Update: We are looking for a family dog and today I went to the humane society in VA (it’s only 30 minutes away from us) and found the most adorable cocker spaniel I’ve ever seen in my life. It was so sweet and I loved it to pieces. But it was on “hold” and had four other people on the wait list as well. We still don’t really know what we’re looking for but we’re just keeping our eyes out.

Reading Update: I’ve read the Hunger Games and now I’m starting the second one because I finally broke down and bought the hardback. I was hoping it would come out in paperback but it never did and our library always had a forever waiting list. I want to read all three before the movie comes out in March. Whoo-hoo!

Happy Weekend!!!

Resource Materials/Ideas that are working for us & what’s God doing in your church?

2012-01-23T11:51:00.001-08:00

As a church member and leader sometimes I just want to know what’s working for other people in terms of materials and resources. I have found that it’s always best to pray over your particular group and ask for God’s direction in what to do for Bible Studies, activities, etc but sometimes He does just that through the observation of what others are doing. So for whatever it’s worth I thought I’d quickly list some of the things that our church is doing right now that seem to be effective for us at this time.

Upwards Basketball – Amazing how God is growing this ministry at our church. We have a fabulous couple leading who are both equally equipped with the gift of administration. That makes such a BIG difference in the effectiveness of certain ministries. Yes, God can use a half brained, unorganized, fly the seat of her britches, kind of person to get things done (take me for instance!) but it sure is nice when He uses those people that soar high in the giftedness of organization and strategic planning. We have around 600 people come out for this – that’s a lot for our church! We are handing out free donuts this Saturday.

Andy Stanley DVD’s for Sunday School – We used several of his studies in our adult Sunday School class and everyone really enjoyed this. The down side is there’s never enough time to discuss in full what you just heard that’s why we split the sessions in half. Our facilitator did a great job planning out enough time to hit the highlights but still……the optimum setting is a small group with about at least an hour or hour and 15 mins. This class is now using a dvd study by Louie Gigleo and I’m not sure yet how that’s going because I’m no longer in that class. I got kicked out. Just Kidding. I’m teaching a girls class now.

Kay Arthur’s Names of God study – This is an oldie but a goodie! I wish there was an updated version of this study but if you can look past the outdated shoulder pads and big hair and really hear the richness of this study, it is a life changer! We are doing this on Wednesday nights right now as a Ladies Bible Study and it’s been really good stuff. Of course you get way more out of any study if you actually do the homework and are willing to share in your small group discussion. And sometimes that happens and sometimes it doesn’t…and that’s okay. You gotta start somewhere and trust the Lord will keep leading and guiding. My small group has been really neat and we’ve become a close group. This doesn’t always happen with each small group. And I can’t say that I see a pattern….some groups just gel and some don’t. I’ve been in both and led both kinds of groups. Not getting discouraged and trusting that God will keep working in us as leaders and members of a small group is important. He is the one exposing truth as we study His word and it is the Holy Spirit that will prompt us to share. When we respond in obedience and take risks is when we see Him do amazing things. And it’s awesome to be a part of.

“Friends and Peer Pressure” by Kara Powell– Junior High Study – I just picked this book up at Lifeway a few months ago as I was researching some material for 4-6th grade girls. I’m currently using this study for Sunday School and I really am liking it. It has great activities, relevant lessons and all based solidly on scripture. I’m hoping she has more curriculum. I know nothing about this author other than what I read on the back of the book! But I read enough chapters to know it was in line with what I was looking for. And so far we are having a great time together and learning about Friendships based on David and Jonathan.

Women’s Missionary Fellowship – This group of ladies have been meeting for a long time and know what they’re doing. I am trying to be more consistent in being a part of this group that meets monthly but don’t always make it. They serve our missionaries, local food shelters, crisis pregnancy center and much more. It is very much a service oriented group and these women are faithful to come and work hard on behalf of others.

Busy Mom’s Night Out – This is a group of younger Moms that meet once a month for some adult sanity therapy. It’s not super organized but we have fun when we meet. Sometimes we just play games and have coffee. Other times we have a designated topic: couponing, budgeting, internet safety for kids, marriage issues, etc. We read For Women Only one month and met to discuss. We’ll do a segment on Organization……well, I won’t exactly be the speaker for that one. I’ll be sitting on the front row gleaning all I can. Ha! Anyways, this is a fun time for us. We also look for random, but divine outreach opportunities and God has been giving us some of those lately. It’s been pretty neat to see. We advertise this through the bulletin and email.

Sunday Night Series – We just finished up a series by Randy Alcorn on Heaven and it was really good. Now we are doing a short series on Jonathan Edwards 70 Resolutions in conjunction with the New Year. It’s been really cool. We don’t have anything for the kids right now and so Mitchell and Sophie have been sitting in the service with me. We sit at round tables in our fellowship hall room and so it’s easy for Sophie to color and she does really well. Mitchell has to write down five things he learned about Jonathan Edwards in his notebook and then he can zone into la-la land if he wants, count nose hairs or do whatever. I’m still debating whether this is a good thing or not. He’s ten but by the end of the day his attention span is the size of a gnat so I don’t really feel bad. We used to let him play the ipad but Ijust don’t feel good about that anymore. I think I like where it stands right now.

Men’s Fraternity, Awana and Youth Group – We incorporate these ministries on Wed. nights and they are working really well for us right now. The kids love Awana – what a great program. We have really good leaders and that makes a big difference. We are in need of a youth pastor right now and are actively looking but it’s neat to see how God has supplied some great help in the meantime.

252 Children’s Church- We love this program! Our leaders do a great job with actually creating the sets and the skits that go along. You know how easy it can be to just skip over the hard stuff….but the hard stuff is what reinforces the point with our kids.

There is so much more that goes on and this is not an exhaustive list of course…….but just a few things that God seems to be using at Community. We are praying for His blessing, growth and refining of our church. Refining……..ouch, that can really hurt sometimes, but such a necessary part of our growth. I am looking forward to the plans God has for His church in 2012.

What about you? What is your church doing right now that you really enjoy and look forward to?

And to the reader/s that don’t attend church……can I ask what keeps you from going to church?

When Affirmation is Hard

2012-01-21T12:33:00.001-08:00

Affirming others does not always come easy for me. Many times I’m thinking positive things about the other person but forget to voice my thoughts. I am trying to get better at communicating these thoughts and especially when it comes to encouraging my children. I have no problem coming down on them when they do something wrong and when they get it right it’s more like an expectation rather than a moment of affirmation. And so this week I had this really weird and random idea come over me in regards to affirming Mitchell. He helped lead a crazy song with Randy in chapel last week and we were really proud of him for getting up in front of his elementary school to do so. While I was cooking dinner I decided to make a trophy for him out of tinfoil and give him an award for showing leadership skills. I’m not a creative person so I knew this was going to a bit risky but I went ahead and just did it.

See, told ya I’m not creative. I’m not really even sure what it is. I just called it abstract art. Ha! So at dinner after we prayed I put on my official sounding voice and led an award’s ceremony. Mitchell stood up in his chair and made an acceptance speech and was honored to receive the tacky tin foil trophy and pack of gum. (Oh, and I should mention that I got that gum for free! More on that later.)We talked a little about how proud we were of him and relived the hilarious memory of that song. I think I see more family award ceremonies in the future.

Some random pics and tidbits:

The kids got a Wii from Randy’s parents and so we’ve all been addicted to bowling and boxing lately. Sophie beats me in bowling every single time. Mitchell has a wicked spin on him and he beats us all the time. We finally sold our plaid couches that we’ve had for 18 years and bought this leather sectional. Oh, and Mitch and Soph decided they should fill the couch up with all their stuffed animals. That was fun…..giving up my seat for a stuffed pink poodle. Mitchell’s angry birds crack me up. He loves those things.

I am finally getting the coupon thing down! I’m not an extremist or anything but I do have a notebook. I’m not ready to call it a coupon binder quite yet but I do have a stocked notebook that I’ve been keeping up with. I got three packs of UP2U gum for free this week and was rather obnoxious about it. I was meeting Randy at Subway for lunch and I couldn’t wipe the grin off my face I was so excited. I laid all three packs on top of his books he had spread out at the table. And now I’m bragging about my first free stuff on my blog – more obnoxiousness. Sorry. We also had a Busy Mom’s Night Out at my house this weekend and our coupon speaker gave some more tips so I’m continuing to learn about this topic and hopefully will keep saving.

I would say the basic tips in starting out in couponing would be to:

1) Get a Sunday Paper and clip the coupons of stuff you use. Some people say clip all the coupons of stuff you don’t use. I don’t do this though because I will quit if it gets to involved.

2) Start with a small binder with a few basic sections: bread/grains, canned, dairy, frozen, snacks. Use baseball card holders to hold coupons in.

3) Look at Southern Savers (there are other great sites too but I like SS best) each week to see what your local grocery store has on sale. They list everything for you. Some states vary but mostly it’s spot on. Go under “other” at top bar and it has a drop down of other grocery stores that aren’t included on the top bar. Lowes is one grocery store that is under “other”.

4) Look at your coupons to use in conjunction with the sale items your grocery store is promoting. This is where you save a lot of money. If your store has a great sale on frozen vegetables then this is the time to use your coupon for that brand. I bought a bag of Birds Eye frozen corn today for .20 because it was on sale and they doubled my .50 coupon. It was Buy One Get One Free and I only bought ONE for half the price so that put it at .20

Have you seen that IKEA commercial…..or is it Target?….where the woman is walking out of the store with tons of bags in her hands and she’s screaming at her husband, who is waiting on her in the car, “START THE CAR! START THE CAR!” She sort of feels naughty because she got such great deals and she’s soooo excited. Well, that chick is me lately after my grocery store deals. Ha! I love it. Oh, and I will say that I am sticking to one main grocery store and one drug store right now. I don’t have the time to drive all over to tons of places. I could save more that way but I’m happy with what I’m doing for now.

Hope ya’ll have a great weekend!!!!!

A new goofy song for chapel service–epic!

2012-01-19T19:26:00.001-08:00

Randy gets to speak in our school’s chapel service every so often and today before he spoke he and Mitchell led a crazy song. Nothing like getting the kids totally hyped up and then making them sit still for 25 minutes. The teachers duck when Randy comes around their classes because he always jokes around with the kids and gets them all wound up and then leaves them with the teacher to unwind. Sort of like when Grandparents get the grandchildren for a weekend visit or something and send them back all sugared up and spoiled rotten.

Mitchell learned this song at Woodlands Camp a few years back and to this day it remains one of his favorites. So he was really excited and nervous about helping Randy lead it. And like the annoying overly involved mother, not only did I show up on the front row for chapel but I videoed the entire thing. But I did ask first if he minded because I wasn’t going to do it if he didn’t want me to. He said he was totally okay with it.

So if you would please, let me introduce to you the performing duo, Randy and Mitchell……performing “I am in a German Band” for the elementary chapel service. It’s sort of long for a blog post and I don’t expect anyone to watch the entire thing but I will say that I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time….but mainly it’s the last half that’s the funniest. I had to put this up on the blog for record’s sake….this is the family album right now.

Randy and Mitchell leading I am in a German Band in chapel

When you don’t feel God

2012-01-17T07:57:00.001-08:00

Can I confess here and say that sometimes I don’t feel God. Sometimes I feel he is distant and that I’m far removed. The reality is that God is not distant because He is always with me. There are times when I, in my spirit of independence and stubbornness, move away from God. And I find myself coming back in sheer desperation. Longing to hear his voice. You know what I mean. Not that I actually hear it like I hear my own kids ~~fighting or whining~~ quoting Bible verses. But that confirmation in your heart and spirit that God just spoke into your life. He gave you clear direction. Answered a prayer maybe or just opened your eyes to something new you needed to see. I love it what that happens. Sometimes it takes the feeling or the presumption of the silent distance to appreciate the loud nearness. I have been in that “distant” phase for some reason. I’m not sure why. But I feel His nearness moving in and I’m thankful. I’m thankful for the faithfulness of my God. The reality that even when I don’t “feel” him there, that he is. But I’m especially thankful that he lets me feel his presence and reality in overwhelming ways where I can see clearly that he is there.

Be encouraged today, the one true God is crazy in love with you and he desires to be loved by you.

Leaving Margin

2012-01-12T10:17:00.001-08:00

I love this term. Randy talked about it on Sunday morning. Early on God made this up as part of His provision for the poor. Remember how Ruth gleaned from the edges of the fields….how she got to pick up what was left over on the outskirts. But these “leftovers” were left intentionally because that was the way God set it up. And as good stewards of what God has given us, no matter how big or small, we will be blessed when we leave margin in our lives for others. Margin in our time. Margin in our finances. Margin in our resources. It doesn’t happen by accident because by nature we are prone to fend for ourselves. In our flesh we think about margin after we are fully satisfied and have leftovers we don’t need or want. We are probably more apt to think in terms of margin at Christmas time when our hearts are full and nostalgic. It just feels good to give at Christmas time. Maybe we even think it will score us a few brownie points with God. But God doesn’t keep score. He settled that at Calvary for us. To think we can add to that ultimate act of love and forgiveness cheapens His grace. But allowing margin in our lives allows us to live according to God’s design and principles. And as we do this, we find peace in obedience and He uses us to help provide the needs of others. But if we only fill our lives to the rim and overflowing with self satisfying needs and desires then we’ll never experience the fullness of what life in the Body of Christ is really meant to be.

Margin. Intentional planning and leaving behind of resources for the purpose of providing for others.

And for me right now, I want more margin in my life. There is some. But my heart desires more. More margin, Lord. Show me what this looks like.

Pastor’s Wife does not always = She sings and piano’s

2012-01-11T11:31:00.001-08:00

I will tell you in this space what I told our church two years ago as Randy and I faced the congregational interrogation while we were candidating for the Sr. Pastor position. A church member asked if I sang or played the piano. My response was this:

The most musical part of my entire self is my name. Melody. That’s as good as it gets when it comes to me being musical. I don’t play the piano or sing in the choir. I might could cut a rug but I didn’t exactly see that happening anytime soon. Ha! And I’m really actually kidding anyways. I’m no dancer. Although I do dance……… when nobody’s looking. Anyways, back to the point….

For years I faked singing alto in our church’s youth choir. I wasn’t even sure what “alto” meant but evidently I was one. See, I had to fake it because I was in love with a certain someone who was a pastor’s son and he was going to Bible college to get trained so he could be a pastor and everyone in their right mind knows that you can’t be a pastor’s wife unless you sing and play the piano. So I had to at least pretend like I could sing. And so I did.

That certain someone who is now my husband, Randy, never really had a clue about this until we were talking about marriage. I told him everything about not singing, playing the piano – all of it. I was sort of clinched up tight and had my eyes closed ready for the, “See ya later sistah! Nice knowin’ ya but I gotta have a woman with a set of mighty fine vocals in order to be in ministry.” But that didn’t happen. He was so okay with it. We talked it through and it was such a satisfying and sweet conversation. He just wanted me to be me. Awwww….that is so stinkin’ sweet! I’m about to get all mushy here. Pull yourself together, Melody.

Okay, I’m back.

Anyways……all this singing talk to say this: I still don’t sing in the choir or play the piano. Only once, in second grade, did I ever sing a solo and I’m pretty sure the entire thing was off key. And I’ve never considered having to sing in public for any reason and just the thought of having to sing in public has the potential of throwing this pastor’s wife into a holy schmoly panic attack.

And yet, this very thing happened to me on December 3rd!

My all time most embarrassing moment to date. I was called on to sing in front of 300 people. Into the live microphone. Eleven times over.

You can’t even imagine the fear struck pain I was in walking up on stage. I looked over at Randy and said, “This is my worst nightmare.” Randy shook his head in full awareness of my pain. Mitchell quickly assured me it was no nightmare and that I had to get up there. Sophie was cheering me on and I was planning my funeral because I knew I was about to die right there in front of all our church peoples. Randy ended up getting called on as well for “nine ladies dancing” and so we both made fools of ourselves, together. How romantic.

So here it is: the height and depth, or death, of my vocal career. It was the intermission of a concert at our church. Twelve people were called do the Twelve days of Christmas and I was “two turtle doves” so I got to sing it twelve times into the mic!!!! Awwww……I’m dying all over again just thinking about it. I’m on the end in the black and sing “two turtle doves” and Randy is in a black shirt on the other end.

My husband called me at home a few days after this happened and said, “Get ready for your phone to ring. Someone put it up on Youtube and classes at the school are watching it.” And so the four of us sat down to watch this video together for the first time. We laughed so hard as a family. We had to watch several times because we were laughing and couldn’t hear it all. So looking back on it…….it really was funny and fun. But I wish to never ever ever do it again.

Have you ever been called on to do something embarrassing in front of people? Go ahead….dig it up from the depths of your past…..it will be therapeutic to share.

Don’t make fun of your Doctor even if you think you’re never going back.

2012-01-09T06:31:00.001-08:00

Sophie has a fabulous allergy doctor who was wonderful with her the last time we saw him. It was over a year ago and he was one of those kinds that gets on the floor and right at eye level with your child and speaks in “baby language” sort of. He has an accent and so to add the baby talk tone on top of the accent that ends up coming out nasal is really quite funny. The day we left the allergist we were told we could just see our regular Pediatrician since we were on a good work up of meds and her issues seemed more seasonal. I was pleased with that. So we said goodbye to Dr. Sharma for what we thought would be forever but for some reason his accent stayed with us. We sort of go around talking like him sometimes. Okay, more like a lot. And then of course Mitchell has picked up on it even though he’s never met the man and he will break out in the “Dr. Sharma” voice and we all have a great time. It’s all in fun, not malicious or anything. And it was all safe because I knew we’d never go back there. So I thought.

Fast forward to today. We have an appt. with Dr. Sharma, whom we have impersonated for the last 12 months. Lovely.

Sophie has been struggling so much with her allergies that after three visits with our pediatrician in the last ten weeks he is sending us BACK to the allergist. The Pediatrician asked me who we saw for our allergist and when I said “Dr. Sharma”, Sophie just looked at me and started laughing. She is way past the divert-her-attention-so-you-can-cover-up-whatever-just-happened phase so there was nothing I could do about it. We both knew what she was laughing about. Thankfully the pediatrician didn’t ask about our antics but continued to suggest that we make an appointment with the best allergist out there, Dr. Sharma. I found myself wanting to desperately ask for a phone consult instead but knew it was best for Sophie to go see him. And so we set the appointment.

Mitchell has been coaching Sophie and saying, “Sophie, you can’t talk like Dr. Sharma when you go see him and you can’t laugh or tell Mom to talk like him.” He’s laughing the entire time he’s telling her these things and I can’t help but wonder if he’s secretly hoping that she does spill the beans! I’m trying to stay out of it because I know how these things work. The more you talk about them the greater the scene you are setting yourself up for. But on the other hand I want to casually remind her that we really don’t want Dr. Sharma to know that we talk like him at home……because how weird is that? Only freak show families do that kind of thing.

So here’s my question: How awful would it be for me to consider a little double dose of Benadryl before the appointment so as to make Sophie less cognitive of this situation?

I’m totally kidding. I wouldn’t do that. So we’ll just hope for the best. I’m learning a lesson…….never ever make fun of your Doctor, even if you think you’ll never see him again. And I’m once again reminded of what my Mother has always told me, “Beware, your sins will find you out!”

Full Circle and pretty funny

2012-01-07T18:04:00.001-08:00

A few months ago Sophie and I drove into the Food Lion parking lot and passed this:

Sophie screamed with excitement, “Look Mom! The Eiffel Tower!” She was serious. And I seriously laughed so hard I thought I was going to bust something loose. I explained to her what that really was and we went on. Keep in mind this was a few months ago and we never talked about it again. And then just this past week Soph and I were at a kitchen store and we saw this:

We both were oohing and awwing over the cuteness factor of the pink Eiffel Tower kitchen hand towels. Anything pink we love and then throw in some pompoms at the bottom and we get annoyingly girlish and giddy. We both relished the moment and then Sophie says as flatly as she possibly could’ve, “But Mom, we know it’s just power lines.”

Oh my word. Too funny!!

Christmas 2011 in Review

2012-01-05T12:06:00.001-08:00

The Jesse Tree advent devotional was a wonderful experience for us this year

Star Wars Lego Advent was equally awesome if that doesn’t sound too sacrilegious. Ha! It really was fun. A friend sent it to us in the mail and we all anticipated daily what the next “piece” would be. Feeling like this might be a tradition for us in the future.

Sophie enjoyed her cute Christmas dresses I bought last year for 75% off! That’s the key: buy now for next Winter and hope your child doesn’t grow much more than you anticipated. So far this has worked like a charm for us.

Night of D’lights at our church was a fantastic event this year. Great food, wonderful music and a fabulous speaker.

A Christmas Birthday Party Tea was a highlight for me and Sophie this year. Thankful for the invite from our sweet friend, Abby.

My Mom came up December 22nd and stayed til the day after Christmas. We all had a great time together from making a gingerbread house, to looking at lights around town to putting together a 1500 pc coke puzzle.

Oh yeah, and ice skating. Sophie’s first time. Mitchell brought a friend from school and they froze but had a blast. This little thingy Sophie is using worked great for her. She was flying out of control the entire time but loved it.

Christmas Day started with a devotional from Sophie out of her new princess devotional book. It was precious. I posted it on YouTube but you can’t hear anything because she’s using a soft, reverent reading voice. Mitchell sang “Mary, did you know” which melted my heart like butter. And then they dug into presents.

Mitchell’s favorite was the Slave One Star Wars lego set and Sophie’s fave was her baby doll and LaLa Loopsy doll.

Randy’s favorite was his last two helmets for his SEC collection. He completed the SEC and now he’s half way through the ACC. I think I said that right? He’s so cute when he organizes the helmets. He puts them in ranking order and then pulls the two playing teams and puts them on top of the tv and yells through the entire game. Love it for him. I compare it to my black shoes collection only not nearly as valuable. Ha! Kidding.

After we opened gifts we had a sweet communion service at church. It was really neat. All the kids came up on stage and Randy talked to them and told them how proud he was that they came to church. I thought that was kind of neat. He showed a cute video that we all enjoyed and talked to the kids and then led the rest of the service. Really neat to have communion on Christmas Day as a church family.

Got home and ate lunch and then the kids got right into playing with toys.

Sophie dressed up not once…….

Not twice…….

And not even three times……

But more like twenty times from the trunk of dress up clothes that her Grandmother gave her.

We were looking forward to Randy’s parents coming to celebrate Christmas with us right before New Year’s but his Mom got sick and they couldn’t come. We Skyped them in and they got to watch the kids open the Wii and toys they gave them. It was pretty cool. Randy ended up getting a horrible virus on New Year’s Eve and couldn’t even go to church on Sunday morning. So I preached for him.

Just Kidding. I’m not a lady preacher. It worked out okay because we had a brunch planned and one of the deacons took charge and church went on. Cool how that can and should work. Randy is better and we are all on the up and up now. We did a neat family New Year’s project that I’ll share about later because I think it will be a new tradition for us from now on.

Also, I have to tell you about my all time Most Embarrassing Moment that happened to me in December. December 3rd at 7pm to be exact. OH.MY. WORD. is all I can say. And it’s all on YouTube! But that’s for another day and post.

I’m not sure how often I’ll be posting. We’ll see how this goes. I’ve enjoyed my time off from blogging although it sure has been nice writing up this recap of the last five weeks.

Hoping ya’ll had a great Christmas and New Year’s!!!!

Taking a Break

2011-11-30T07:32:00.001-08:00

Well, I completed an entire month of daily blogging even if some posts were like “Um, my big toe hurts ya’ll.” Those posts I’m not real proud of but something had to go in that big white space staring back at me. Daily blogging was a fun challenge and one that stretched me especially while being out of town, during a Holiday and while having the flu. Swine flu. Not really swine flu. I made that part up because it just sounded more dramatic and every time I hear that word I have a visual of the prodigal son playing in a pig pen. Random but true. Anyways, as much as I enjoyed the challenge of blogging daily I do feel it’s time for me to pull off the blog for a while. I’ve had this feeling for a while now and have neglected it, talked myself out of it or let others talk me out of it. I love to write. It’s how I process things. I don’t claim to be a real writer or anything but I do enjoy it. I’ve never considered blogging time consuming because I can sit down and spit out a post pretty quickly and move on to the next item at hand. However I’ve noticed that the “next items at hand” are not the priorities they need to be right now. I’ve gotten a bit swept away into blogville and it’s time to take a break for a while. How long? I don’t know. Maybe January 1, 2012 I’ll be back with an attitude. Because we all know that’s lacking. Ha!!!

But I wanted to leave you with a few blogs that I love to read. Some are on my sidebar and others aren’t because I never got around to putting them up. But I think you’ll really like these people. I feel like I’m taking a very long trip or sending off my kid to college. Why am I turning all weird about this? It’s just time off from a blog. Gee-whiz.

Okay, so these are a few awesome blogs…..

Amy Sullivan – my all time favorite blog. I actually got to meet Amy at a Conference this summer and she’s the real deal. Loves God, loves others and loves to laugh. My kind-a-girl. And her writing style rocks!

Samantha Kreiger - I’ve really enjoyed getting to know this young Mom and Christian writer through her blog. She has a sweet heart for the Lord and openly shares where she is in life.

Glynnis Whitwer – You’ll find great organizational tips on this blog and a great sense of humor from Glynnis.

Kelly’s Korner – You may already read her but I love her blog. She is the cutest person in the world who loves Jesus passionately and seems to have an ability to connect with just about anyone and everyone. You will love her spirit if you don’t already read her popular blog.

Thank you for your support, comments and for following Life is a Bowl of Wedgies! It’s been an awesome year and I look forward to coming back when the time is right for me and my family. I pray over you now that the rest of your year will be filled with peace, grace and a clearer vision of who Jesus Christ is and what He means to you. And I’m slapping my name all over that prayer too. Love you guys!

3 ways we try to celebrate Christmas instead of Xmas.

2011-11-29T05:32:00.001-08:00

Someone recently asked me on Facebook,

“Are you going to talk about how you guys work Jesus into Christmas? I am finding it harder and harder to get away from Santa, and keep the focus on Jesus, so frustrating when everyone around you is doing Xmas, and not Christmas!”

Oh how I relate to this statement! Working Jesus into Christmas is a sad way to put it but isn’t it true? It takes intentional work to fight against the consumer pull, the busy school and church calendar and the festivities relating to everything but the birth of Jesus Christ. And how do we get there? We know the real reason for the season and we tell our kids why we celebrate Christmas and all. We’d be mortified if someone asked our kids why they celebrate Christmas and they said “SANTA CLAUSE” or “TOYS” or “The birth of Christmas trees”.

It’s easy to see how quickly the real reason for Christmas gets snuffed out. It happens in subtle ways. Like with our cutie patootey three year old who must go to the mall to see Santa. And in order to see Santa you don’t just put on your play clothes. You get a Christmas outfit. It might not be “Bailey Boys” but it’s close to that cute. One thing calls for another. The tights, the bow and black Patton shoes. But all this is justified because your child will wear it not only to sit on Santa’s lap but he or she will wear it to the playgroup Christmas party, the school play, the church play, and to any other Christmas program. Just change up the color tights and you got yourself a few different outfits. Okay, that makes sense. We’re feeling better about dressing up for Santa. So now your child sits on Santa’s lap and Santa asks the unpardonable question. “What would you like for Santa to bring you this year?” Forgetting how this question could change everything for you and your shopping list you have that moment of “Oh crap! She wants that?” Up to now your child has never mentioned this item before. You’ve heard about the nerf gun, the baby doll and a few other things. But for some reason when the child sees Santa it brings out the desire for the biggest, grandest item out there. A Barbie Jeep, A Hummer, An X-box, etc. Now you feel yourself scrambling to rework the budget, take back what you already bought or maybe just easier to add that to the list and get a few more things for the other child to even it out. Either way, your Christmas thoughts are now in the direction of making that magical moment come true for your child. Because you saw the glimmer in her eye when Santa said he would bring it. And you don’t want to disappoint.

Okay, it doesn’t have to be that bad really. It could just be as simple as not going to see Santa or preparing your child ahead of time that just because you tell Santa what you want doesn’t mean you will get it. There are ways around all that drama I just described. And of course there are more things than Santa that pull our affections from Christ at Christmas time.

Let me share some things we do as family to fight against all the hoopla the world brings on at Christmas. I’m not against Santa or Christmas parties but I want to be more about celebrating Jesus and that being my focus instead of decorating, shopping, event planning and attending and putting on fabulous Christmas meals. I will be honest and say that even in a pastor’s home it is difficult to keep the focus on Christ. And we don’t always follow through with what we want to do but here are a few things we try to do to keep Jesus the center of Christmas in our home.

1) Family Advent Devotional

The Jesse Tree Journey:

If you click on the words in purple you can read more about and also download this free Advent family devotional. I will tell you that it does require time and preparation but it’s packed with solid focus on Christ and in a way that is wrapped with such grace and love. Your family will be richly touched by this exercise. There is a daily reading and thought at the end of each devotional. Also with each day comes a cut out that you can glue onto construction paper. This cut out represents what you read about that particular day. Then you punch holes in the top and run some ribbon through and hang on your “Jesse tree” each day. You can read more at the link for the reason why it’s called a “Jesse Tree”. It’s never too late to start so even if you check into it and see that it starts today, don’t let that hold you back. You can start halfway through and still get something out of it. That’s what we did last year. My friend, Mary, sent me the link and I think I ended up sitting on it for a while and then saw what it was and jumped on it quickly because I knew how special it was. I ended up cutting out all the cut outs and pasting in one afternoon. The kids helped and we got it knocked out for the years to come. I want to laminate them this year so they’ll hold up. I would love to see this project in a hardback book one day but honestly I see the author as one who might not super size or aggrandize this particular project. Ann Voskamp is an amazing woman of God who seeks Him and His glory, not her own. But still….I’d like it all doodied up and in larger print.

2) Read Books that reinforce the message of the birth of Christ/ or movies

In past we have read The Crippled Lamb by Max Lucado and our children love this book. But this year I found a new one that I’m super excited about. It is written by a man who was asked to share the story of Christmas with a group of children. He penned the poem and dedicated it to his 7 month old granddaughter at the time. When she turned seven years old she illustrated the poem and they’ve turned it into a book and it’s simply wonderful. It is like the original poem “The Night Before Christmas” but based on the true night before Christmas and I know it sounds totally cheesy when I type it out loud, but it’s not. Really, it’s awesome.

The Jesus movie is also a fabulous movie to watch as a family during the Christmas season. “The Passion” is too intense, we feel, for our children at this age but one day I see us watching that as well.

3) A family project of giving and serving:

Last year we chose a family to do something special for. It wasn’t necessarily a family in dire need or anything like that. We prayed about who we might could encourage and we felt the Lord put a particular family on our heart. We created an advent basket. Where you purchase 25 different things and wrap them individually with a number on them corresponding with the date. One Dec. 1st they open the “1” package and so on. Last year I pretty much did the shopping for it and the kids helped wrap. This year we got the kids involved more and they helped us think of things our person might like and enjoy. Keeping it a secret might be hard for Sophie. Bless her heart, she tries but it’s not easy to be five and to keep things inside. We’ll see how that goes. We talked with the kids over dinner about how Christmas is about giving. God gave his son for us and we are to have a giving spirit as Christ does. So we gave up something this year in order to put that money towards an advent basket for someone else. And I’ll be honest and say that our kids resisted in the beginning. It didn’t feel good to be deprived of something they were looking forward to. But they came around soon. And I pray their hearts will grow accustomed to giving in such a way that they look forward to it. The Advent Basket is a great family project. I first read about this at Molly Piper’s blog (John Piper’s daughter-in-law). You can click on those purple words again and read more how to set it up.

There are countless opportunities to serve in your local community. If you say you don’t know where to start, I’ll help you. Call your local Salvation Army or Department of Family and Children Services. Your Chamber of Commerce can also direct you to your local food bank or soup kitchen. Lots of needs out there. Last year our family went to the Salvation Army to help pack up Toys for Tots. Sophie helped bag toys and Mitchell did too. It was a great experience for us. Something small but again, something to let us remember that Christmas is a time for giving and remembering the perfect gift that was given to us.

I realize that these aren’t huge things but they are things, nonetheless, to help us keep our eyes on Jesus in the midst of the hustle and bustle. It’s a way we can celebrate Jesus’ birth.

You may find it beneficial to use some of these ideas to help keep Christ in your Christmas this year but isn’t it awesome to know that when you come to God and tell him that you want your family to celebrate Him this year and you would like to know how, that He will show you how. So I’d encourage you to start by praying this year about how God wants you and your family to celebrate Christmas.

I’d love to hear how you keep Christ in Christmas: past plans or ideas for this year.

What we’re considering

2011-11-28T05:58:00.001-08:00

The one on the right. Isn’t he a-dor-a-ble? We’ve been looking and thinking for a long time about a dog for our family. We’ve always had a dog but our last experience was so traumatic that we have held off for a long time. Mitchell especially loves animals and interacts so well with them that we really want to get one. We sort of want a big dog like a goldendoodle (golden retriever and poodle mix) but because we make quite a few trips to GA we feel like that would really be hard. Also, we don’t have a fenced in backyard. So we keep coming back to a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel like in this picture. I called the guy who has these puppies and asked tons of questions. He already had a lot of calls on it and he’s already sold the black one. The plan was for us to go look at it after church on Sunday but Sophie and I got sick and then Randy ended up having a meeting that afternoon so it just didn’t work out. We keep going back and forth on if we’re ready for a dog right now….training it, it’s cold outside which makes harder for house breaking, puppy stage and the time required in having a puppy, etc. So who knows if we’ll actually end up with this cutey patootey little dog. For some reason we are just drawn to this breed. We first saw one at a pet store and went in a few different times to play with it and we loved it. When we went back in and it had been sold we were sort of sad although we knew we’d never pay the pet store price. These dogs seem to have a sweet disposition and are just adorable. We hear they are very loyal dogs and have a great temperament. So it’s the direction we’re headed in.

Do you have any thoughts on a good dog for a family with young kids?

What happens when you don’t get a flu shot

2011-11-27T14:21:00.001-08:00

We were so glad to get home last night and unpacked and then at midnight what I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy swept over me. A violent virus that kept me nauseated and hugging the toilet for hours. Finally at about 3am I settled down and actually fell asleep and felt like it was passing. I hear “pitter patter” foot steps at 3:15am and it’s Sophie telling me she felt sick. She was just as sick as I was, poor thing. I felt so bad for her. We were next to each other having this bonding moment that I was so wishing could come in another form. She slept with me the rest of the night and we even had a soda cracker and sprite picnic in the bed. Lovely. Just what we were looking forward to. Randy was in the guest bedroom because on Saturday nights he stays up real late working on his sermon and I don’t sleep well with the computer light. I was just praying he wouldn’t get this stuff because there was no way he’d be preaching if he did. Thankfully he hasn’t gotten it yet. He was so sweet to me and Sophie…….he went out and got us Sprite and Gatorade. And he stayed later than he normally does in the morning so he could take Mitchell to church with him. He took care of his girls. And that’s just one reason I love my man so much.

Thankfully Sophie got a mild version of the virus and she’s better. It’s awful to watch your little one be so sick. I was getting her some Sprite and showing her that she needed to take small sips and little bites of her cracker to avoid getting sick again and she looked up at me and said, “I love you, Mom.” It was so sweet. And it made me realize, like Randy taking care of us, that caring for a sick person is just a simple way of showing our love for each other. For a Mom or Dad, “it’s just what you do” and you don’t think about it as showing love because you do love and that’s why you do it. But it really is such a unique act of love that only means so much when you’re sick as a dog! Blah!

About those flu shots….I said I wasn’t getting one because the last time I got one it gave me the flu and I’ve heard of so many other people that had that same experience. So maybe you want to consider getting one this year.

I have never looked so forward to tomorrow. It has to be better! But if it’s not I promise to get Randy to guest post for me instead of cramming in a post like this at the end of the day. We’d all be glad for that, wouldn’t we? Yep. True.

Leaving Our Old Stomping Grounds

2011-11-26T07:37:00.000-08:00

Atlanta....the place Randy and I were both born
and grew up. We got saved in GA. It's where we had our first date, many more
dates and then got married. After spending two years in
Greenville, SC we moved back to GA but this time an
hour north of Atlanta. Our first church plant took place here. Great
friendships were developed during this time and we saw people come to Christ. God brought us
our children while living in GA and we buried my sweet Dad while living in GA.
And so yeah, Georgia holds some very special memories and will always have a feeling
of "home sweet home"
I'm thankful that while we build on our new home life in NC that the strong foundation of our previous homes
contribute and serve as a reminder of the graciousness of our God. That He is doing a new thing and it doesn't have
to be on my old stomping grounds as much as I miss and love them.
It was so good to be back home and it good to be traveling home today. NC here we come!!! We'll be there in about six hours:)

Black Friday

2011-11-25T07:04:00.001-08:00

Nope, didn’t do it this year. Last year’s experience and year before’s experience is why. I did, however, get up at 8am and head over to Walmart and found two things that I wanted for the kids but wasn’t going to stay in three hour lines for. I went not expecting to get anything and came out with a few good deals. My next stop was to Lifeway to pick up Jesus Calling for $5. I wanted to stock up on them as gifts because it’s one of the very best devotional books I’ve ever read. I’ve given away about 8 copies and this price is fabulous. We’re in Atlanta and so I drove the one I was always go to when I’m here visiting but it was GONE. Like not there. Another store is there. So I drove over the Family Christian Bookstore to ask if they might know where Lifeway moved to and THEY were gone too. I called and found out that the closest one is 40 minutes away. I’m so sad that two of the best Christian bookstores went out of business in Alpharetta……bunch of heathen city slickers who won’t buy Christian books! I’m kidding but I am very disappointed about this.

We spent Thanksgiving Day with my Mom and my family and had a really nice time together. We cooked, watched the Macy’s parade, played Bananagrams and caught up with each other. Special times. Today we head over to Randy’s family and spend the day and have dinner and we’re looking forward to that. We are especially excited about seeing our new baby niece Addie. Sophie is smitten already and so are we.

Will get back to more normal blog posts in a few days. I know they’ve been a bit……zzzzzz…….boorrrrring…….We head back to NC Saturday. It’s been hard to blog daily the last few days and I almost gave up but am so close to calling it a month straight of daily blogging that I’m hanging in there. Not the greatest accomplishment in the world but a fun one for this no-name blogger.

Happy Black Friday and may your trip to Walmart for a loaf of bread not end you up trampled or attacked.

A full heart

2011-11-24T06:51:00.001-08:00

Thanking God today for…..

Him
A certain dark headed man that I’ve been married to for 18 years
A ten year old boy that keeps me in a state of laughter and joy and sometimes total stress
A little girl who is amazing, spunky and hilarious
All my family
Crisp Air
Yellow, Orange and Brown leaves
The smell of those leaves burning
A place to call home
Smells of Thanksgiving dinner cooking
Rope swing in the woods
The security of family love

Enjoying my family today and hope you are too. Happy Thanksgiving my friends!

A Blending of Services

2011-11-23T06:47:00.001-08:00

Sunday night was one of the coolest experiences for our church. We hosted the annual Community service put on by the Ministerial Alliance in our community. Randy has been a part of the Ministerial Alliance group for the past year and a half. It's made up of a group of pastors from area churches in the city. The group sponsors the Holy Week services at Easter (the community meets at different churches with a "white church, black pastor speaks - black church, white pastor speaks" format), has a community prayer meeting each Tuesday (rotate to one of four churches each month - we host the one on the 4th Tuesday) and has a Thanksgiving service. Randy volunteered our church to host the service for this year, and since we are a "white church" we had a black pastor to preach (which means he also brings his choir/praise team to sing and lead music). Elm Grove Baptist is right down the road from us and the pastor (also the president of the NAACP in Rockingham Co.), his associate (retired principle of a local elementary school), and their praise team helped out in the service. The associate pastor brought the sermon and it was amazing. A powerful sermon on Thanksgiving. We had a lot of people from the community who came...probably 300 people at the service. We had desserts afterwards and had a chance to talk to some of our neighboring church friends. The service seemed to be very well received among our congregation although this was a new experience for our church. They loved the music but who wouldn’t because it was the most uplifting, pure and free worship. The sermon was fantastic (Biblical and masterfully presented). We had probably 40-50 African American brothers and sisters in Christ leading us in or participating with us in worship. I love how interactive and free these believers are. Many of our church members used the words “Free and unrestrained” in describing the praise team,time of worship and response to the sermon. Lots of "uuhuh!"'s and "that's right!"'s in the sermon. Clapping in the praise time (our people included), etc.

“Beautiful Body of Christ” is what sums it up for me. I went away so full. I was on an ecclesiastical high for at least two days afterwards. The praise team generated such emotion out of me that I asked Randy how weird it would be for me to put in a request for them to sing at my funeral one day in the long distant future. He laughed and said, “Do it” and I did. But they made no promises considering that really was a weird request. But that’s the kind of celebratory music I would love from my brothers and sisters in Christ declaring what I believe to be true of my Savior. I know that’s weird to think about but I do think about what my funeral will be like…..what a huge day for the believer. A HUGE day. And I want mine to be celebrated with gusto…..but hopefully in about 60 more years.

Until then I’m basking in this most recent wonderful church experience with surrounding churches and believers. And I pray I can become more unrestrained in my own worship of God…..both personal and corporate. To let go and be fully in His presence on this earth.

Did all that really just happen?

2011-11-22T04:04:00.001-08:00

I was so ready to go to bed when I was browsing through the CVS flyer last night and saw a camera I’ve had my eye on for Sophie for Christmas. It was on sale and after doing some quick online research realized it was the best price out there. I decided to go get it. So I got in Randy’s car and as I backed out I heard a crunch noise. I had no clue what I had run over so I got out to look and didn’t see anything at first. I drove a bit further down the driveway and heard a dragging noise. I parked and got back out to look under the car and that’s when I saw the handlebars of the Barbie bike peeking out from the under the bumper. This makes the second time it’s been run over. I pulled but couldn’t get it to come out from under the car. I didn’t want to pull a piece of the car off so I kept gently working with the bike but still couldn’t get it to come out. Going in and telling Randy I had run over the bike and needed his help to get it out from under the car is not what I wanted to do. But it’s what I had to do because I wanted to get that camera before they closed. Well, actually at this point I was thinking a new bike is what Sophie would be getting for Christmas. Randy worked at it for a while and was having trouble getting it out as well. The training wheel had lodged between that exhaust pipe thingy and something else. He finally got it out and we were both shocked that the bike was in perfect shape! Not a single dent from what we could tell. We even pushed it and it rolled fine. Yay! Sophie wouldn’t have to get a bike for Christmas because Mom ran over hers.

I had a few minutes to make it to CVS before they closed and right as I was about to pull into the parking lot I saw blue lights out of nowhere come on behind me. Surely they weren’t intended for me. Ah, but they were. I didn’t recall speeding. I had to chuckle at the thought of what could have been. A Barbie bike hanging out from my muffler. Because the thought did occur to me that I could just drag that thing behind me if I couldn’t get it to pry loose. That would’ve been a nice addition to the citation at hand:unlawfully towing of a trike. But this wasn’t the reason for the stop. I had a headlight out. I hand over my license and he asks for my registration. I have the deer in one headlights look because I don’t know what he’s talking about. He describes to me what I’m supposed to have and I call Randy. Randy says, “Cry” I’m too mad to cry so that doesn’t work. I just had to take the citation for an expired registration and lack of inspection. This is new to use because we didn’t have to have cars inspected where we lived before. We’ve been here for almost three years though and we’re just now figuring this out. Hmmm. Not good. So I got the $215 fine but it will be waived when I just go to court and show them my updated registration and inspection proof. So that’s good. I sat in the car for like twenty minutes while the police officer wrote me up. Finally I got out of my car to see if there was a problem and so we’re both standing outside under the street light. I wished I hadn’t done that because now all the people in the parking lot have a full view of me. Even the CVS employee peering out the window. I’m serious. I saw him looking out the window at me and the officer. When our nice little law enforcement conversation was over I really didn’t know if I wanted to go in the store because I was so embarrassed but I decided I had to. So I got the door and then realized they had closed.

So I drove home, got out of the car and threw Sophie’s bike across the yard. Not really, but I felt like it.

Randy says, “So you drove over Sophie’s car, came home with fines and never got to the store you wanted to go to.” And yeah, that pretty much sums it up.

The good news is it just has to be a better day today and I’m pretty sure it will be.

“Spoken by Sophie, Written by Mom”

2011-11-21T05:44:00.001-08:00

Sophie and I have this little method we’ve used for the last few years where she writes a card to someone in her own scribble scrabble way of writing and then she interprets it for me. At the bottom of her writing I write out the words she just read to me. And then I sign “Spoken by Sophie, Written by Mom” and she tops it off with a picture. Sometimes we hand deliver the cards and sometimes we mail them. If she hand delivers them she likes to read the card aloud to the person and many times the message changes from the original text. And it gets really super long. At home she’ll write about five letters a day and will read to us at various times. So this morning I’ve asked Sophie to be a guest writer and write a letter to you. She is actually writing out her letter now at the kitchen table……

“I love you. We love God so much that we never want Him to die again which He will not perish and I thank you that He is the Lord. I hope you feel so better if you are sick or hurt and please help God to make you feel better and God is so sweet so very much that He always loves us. He loves all of us on this earth so very much that He can’t ever give up on us and He always loves us even when we disobey our parents which God is our parent. And God always always very loves us so good.”

Our letters are not always theologically correct but I still write them word for word and do a little explaining if I need to later. For instance she thanks you, the reader, that God is Lord. Not exactly something you can take credit for but at least she’s thankful that God is Lord and so we’ll just be glad for that today. But I am struck by her overwhelming understanding of God’s love for her today. I want her to bask in this lavish love and I pray it compels her to love her Creator back with a depth that can’t be compared to any other love in her life. So lets all be reminded these few days before Thanksgiving that God’s love for us outlasts, outblasts and outcasts anything you put next to it. I love His love.

Sunday Bloopers and Mishaps

2011-11-20T05:25:00.001-08:00

Well, unfortunately I don’t have to draw from the too far past on this one. Last Sunday I brought coffee with me to church so I would have enough brain cells to listen and process what my pastor hubs would be saying from the fern stand. Yeah, he swiped the family fern stand that used to be behind the red paisley chair to use as his pulpit. But I’m not bitter or anything. I just think about the fern that used to sit on that stand all through his sermon and how that relates to my spiritual decline. I’m kidding, I’m kidding. But he really does use this little fern stand and I love it for him because it fits his Bible perfect and he loves it. Anyways, last Sunday I was sitting on the back row with a friend who was going to be having surgery during the week. I had brought my coffee in a tall thermos and had it at my feet. I’d taken about three sips and then kicked it over during the choir special. And it went rolling. And rolling. While spilling coffee out the entire time. I instantly did this gesture thing with my hands like trying to grasp at it and reel it back in but you know there’s no way on earth your hands will stretch that far but just in case God has mercy on you and performs a miracle you attempt anyways. So here I am looking like I’m doing sign language to recover the escaping Starbucks thermos meanwhile coffee is spilling all under people’s feet. I ran out to get paper towels and left the stray cup with my friend. I came back and cleaned up what I could. The lady in front of me turned to give her condolences, another lady cleaned up underneath the two pews in front of her and every single usher stood behind me watching. One gave me a thumbs up with a huge grin. I was too skeered to see what the others might be thinking. I’m wondering if there will be an announcement in the bulletin this morning on behalf of the trustees that ask church members to refrain from bringing coffee. There should be because that was just a fiasco. My friend was laughing and then I got tickled and was thankful I happened to be sitting on the back row.

Happy Sunday and may you hang on tightly to your coffee!

No place like home

2011-11-19T06:13:00.001-08:00

When we moved to NC two years ago we heard about a theatre company that puts on an outstanding performance of The Wizard of Oz which is a favorite classic in our family. In fact, we can all put on a pretty serious impression of the cowardly lion. Puttem’ Upppp , Puttem’ Uppp! Mitchell is sort of mortified when I do this in public like if someone makes me mad or something and I pull out my lion dukes. Ha, just kidding. I don’t really do that.

The Carolina Theatre puts on some really great shows and this theatre downtown Greensboro is beautiful inside. We had great aisle seats and the characters come down the aisles and one time Dorothy pointed at Sophie and she was thrilled about that. And one time the straw man came down the aisle and lost some of his straw right beside our chair so Sophie picked it up and that was her treasure for the moment. She tried to give it back to him after the show but in the mass chaos of the crowd he couldn’t see her trying to give it back to him. So in this picture with Dorothy you can see her little token of the straw man. Dorothy was incredible. Only a Freshman in High School and had such a gorgeous, mature voice. And just radiant. Sophie fell in love with her. We happened to catch her on our way out real quick. All the little girls were flocking to her. Sophie really wanted to talk to her but of course that couldn’t work out unless you paid for the $50 tea party before the show. No thanks, don’t have that much money.

I found Sophie’s costume at Goodwill for $3 a few months ago while I was killing time before an appointment. Her ruby red slippers never worked out quite so well because they were too big but not big enough to get the next size down (what you get with cheap shoes) so she wore red sandals…..still cute. She can wear the other ones next year. We saw a lot of other Dorothy’s there and a few witches. Mitchell has a tin man costume that is really cool. I got it at a garage sale just for dress up stuff years ago. He rolled his eyes conniption style when I asked if he was going to wear the tin man costume. Ha!

This little Dorothy was worn out. Don’t you remember the feeling as a kid? The late night drive home. The drum of the car, the vibration on your back and the assurance that you will be carried and tucked into your own bed very soon.

Because we all know……… there’s no place like home.

And this is where I originally ended this post. Because how quaint and warm. And true.

But I must speak what’s on my heart.

I hate to ruin a fairy tale ending with pelting cold rain but I as I write these words I have to acknowledge that this warm closing is not the case for all little girls. Not in the past, not now, and not in the future. All around us are girls and boys who fear going to bed at night because of what they endure at the hands of predators. There is no security in their home life because love is lacking. Foster homes are a great alternative to abuse and neglect and I know our system has worked hard to change the stigma of foster homes, group homes, etc. And not only change the stigma but change the program so that children are not revolving in and out of homes. But still, in the best foster homes, there will be an overwhelming sense that……….. there’s no place like home.

My heart aches for these children. And that’s why I have been thinking a lot about mentoring or getting involved in our CASA program in our town, where I would be an advocate for an at risk student. Some of these kids just need to know they have one person cheering them on, supporting them and thinking of them in the midst of all their home mess. A mess some of us can never fully understand. A mess some of us do understand and therefore can offer a divine understanding. Yes, divine……. because we are encouraged in scripture that we endure suffering and hardship for the purpose of comforting others. We aren’t to sit on our past pain. We are to use it to help comfort others. It’s a texture of understanding that can be used to deepen a relationship. While I can’t understand personally the effects of abuse or neglect, I do know how to love with His help.

So I’m praying about what this looks like for me personally. Not this year because I still have a little one at home and she is my God given priority. But next year I’ll have five mornings free a week. I do not see how I can sit at home and not invest in a student who cannot say the words……..there’s no place like home.

She cut her hair!

2011-11-18T04:28:00.001-08:00

I knew it was coming. I just knew it. This previous post confirms my premonitions. Mitchell and I were studying for a Science test in the den while Sophie was coloring and doing her preschool work at the kitchen table. I was quizzing Mitchell over the moon and I heard some snipping but assumed it was Sophie still cutting out her shapes. About five minutes later Sophie came over to me and said, “Do you want to hear my verse I learned today?” She started quoting her new Bible verse and I was so proud of her. She knew it word for word. Well, I gave her a hug and then noticed some hair on her dress. I brushed it off and then noticed a whole lot of hair. I said, “Sophie, how did all that hair get on your dress?” I thought maybe she had cleaned out her brush or something. I’m still not catching on at this point. She shrugged her shoulders and said, “I don’t know.” And then about 30 seconds later she just broke down. I said, “Sophie, did you cut your hair?” You couldn’t tell at first glance but then I saw the shorter lengths. I saw a wadded up chunk of hair in the back of her head and pulled it out. She saw it and just fell apart. I asked her where she did it and through sobs she said, “At the kitchen trash can.” We walked over there and saw this:

“Oh wow, that’s a lot of hair”, fell out of my mouth. When she saw it she bawled even harder. I think she shocked herself really. When she saw how much was there and realized how permanent this was it hit her and she was so upset with herself. At one point I muttered in shock, “Where did all that hair come from?” because you really can’t tell and that looks like so much hair. And she said, “From my (cry, snort, hiccup….) my head.” I knew I couldn’t laugh because she was so upset with herself but I really wanted to laugh out loud. I asked her why she cut her hair and she said, “Because I wanted it short again.”

I felt really bad for her as the night went on because she was just so frustrated with herself. I had to talk to her about how we all make mistakes, etc. She got in trouble for lying to me but I didn’t have to punish her for the hair. She was sick over it herself. Mitchell tried to make her feel better by saying she was like Rapunzel and by the time she went to bed she was sort of liking that analogy. I did feel the need to talk about not cutting her hair again or anyone else’s hair.

I asked Sophie if she minded if I took a picture because one day when she was a lot older she would actually look back on this and think it was funny. She’d want the picture. So I snapped the picture despite the sadness. I’m thinking we go to the hairdresser tomorrow to straighten it out. Sigh. It could be much worse. It could’ve been her bangs since she’s been begging to have them cut off to the top of her head.

I’m curious to know if this is a common thing…….like did you or your children cut their own hair by chance?

Carving Idols

2011-11-17T04:30:00.001-08:00

We were on our way to church last night and Mitchell asks me if it would be okay if he carved an idol.

Of God.

And he even said it that way so insert a maternal heart attack in between the words idol and of God.

I asked him why he’d want to do that and he said so he could see and worship God. I told him other people had similar thoughts in the Bible and it didn’t go over well at.all. with God. I was sort of in panic mode and felt like I had to set him straight as fast as possible before God heard us talking about idols. And of course that’s ridiculous since God is everywhere and sees, hears and knows all things. But still, this was not a conversation I was expecting to have with my ten year old. I told Mitchell that we’d all love to be able to see God on earth but that’s where our faith really comes into play. It’s hard to believe and not see. Believing what the Bible says to be true of God and the Holy Spirit guiding us to truth is sort of like our sight.

The conversation fell short as we rushed into the church for our various activities. Men’s Fraternity for Randy, Awana for the kids and bible study for me. Looking back I wish I hadn’t been in such a rush. It was just pumpkin bread I was running into the church to cut real quick and coffee to set out. It could’ve waited a few more minutes for me to acknowledge the seriousness and innate struggle we all are born with…the desire to see things with our own eyes and in our own form/fashion.

Funny how we are born into this world kicking and screaming for what we know best: the miracle of all our needs being met in one place, the womb. And within no time we are soon fighting for control, our way, our will in this world. With this comes the desire to see with our own eyes. Facts. Hard Evidence. Proof. Human reasoning. We like all that tangible stuff. But faith is different. It trumps it all in a way. Not in a cop-out, ‘crutch for weak minded people’ (thank you Jesse Ventura for that analogy) kind of a way. Faith in God is the submitting of our will, our plans, ourselves to the Lord Jesus Christ. He is Lord no matter what our response is. But when we perceive Him to be Lord of our lives and submit to Him is when we have really embraced true faith. This is what we learned tonight in Bible Study. And it went along so well with the questions Mitchell had. I look forward to a follow up conversation with him tomorrow. Of course this is where Randy is really good at explaining stuff without the heart attacks and all. Nothing really shocks him. So I’d sort of like for him to be the one to follow up on this. Yeah, I know…..cop-out!

Because sometimes life is too serious

2011-11-16T03:05:00.001-08:00

really it is.

The Blue Typewriter Find

2011-11-15T05:26:00.001-08:00

Mitchell has been loving old timey stuff and especially typewriters. We were at an antique store a few months back and the store owner gave Mitchell an old Sears Electric. Said we could order the parts needed online. We didn’t find that to be the case but Mitchell still enjoyed playing with it. This past weekend we had a family weekend and we went to the same antique store and the owner had gotten in a new old typewriter. Ha!

Mitchell started typing on this thing and loved it. The ribbon still works and everything. He was a few dollars short but we taught him to negotiate and he was able to get the typewriter with the rest of his money. He has typed our entire family a letter so far and a poem and his vocab words.

How do you like the decorated roll of toilet paper in the background? That’s a portrait of our family that Sophie drew. Her name is on there too. I’ve never used personalized toilet paper before and I’m really afraid to start. So here sits the same roll of toilet paper for the last four days. And this speaks the language of our home……old broken down typewriters that give a thrill and self portraits on toilet paper just laying around the house.

Have a great day everyone!

Cell Phones and our Kids

2011-11-14T04:00:00.001-08:00

Both our kids, ages ten and five have already informed us that their friends have cell phones. Sophie, five years old, told me the other day that one of her four year old friends had a cell phone. I told her she didn’t have a real one and Sophie said, “uh-huh. She said she had a real one.” It paved the way for two conversations: 1)don’t believe everything you hear 2) even if it were true that’s her Mamma’s decision for her and you already know what your Mamma and Daddy say about it. The reason she knows is because Mitchell came home the other day saying one of his friends in his class has a cell phone. Fourth grade and a cell phone. I’m sure there are reasons out there that could cause a parent to want their fourth grader to have a cell phone so I want to be careful in overstating a point. But in general, I’m watching kids that are way too young get cell phones. Peer pressure is so strong. And not only among kids and teens. As parents we fall into the pressure as well. We want our kids to have a phone like everyone else. Even if it means getting it for them prematurely. But I see a lot of dangers in our kids having cell phones too early.

One danger is the potential for cell phone addiction. I’ve heard some interesting pod casts and read some articles that talk about what this looks like. In general, signs of a cell phone addiction manifest itself when there is anxiety and agitation in the absence of the cell phone. One article describes a text message like a hit of cocaine for the cell phone addict. The brain is stimulated by the constant information, pictures, games, etc that when there’s a stop in the cell phone activity the brain shuts down and the body wants to sleep and can’t think straight. Depression can be brought on when the phone is removed because a person’s life is wrapped around their phone. Their contacts, their games, their texting, updating their Facebook status, checking YouTube hits, checking eBay bids, etc.

It’s amazing at how much easier our phones can make life. At your fingertips you can close a business deal, get coupons, talk to someone across the ocean and have massive amounts of information at our fingertips. You can find the cheapest gas,closest movie theatre, get a magazine subscription all within seconds. Amazing. You can snap a picture of a hairstyle you like and send to your friend to see if she likes it. All this is great practical stuff and doesn’t even scratch the surface of what can be done on our phones.

But how quickly our phones can bite us.

Satan is using technology in subtle and glaring ways to sabotage our families. Pornography was already an epidemic before it could be so easily accessed on our phones. Sexting is considered part of the technology culture we live in. Sending pictures is just what you do now and if it crosses a line, well, that just happens sometimes. A game that started out as fun and therapeutic is now something we long to do and get irritated when we can’t play or don’t beat the latest high score. Real life people are being neglected because of an online community. A small screen the size of a business card is a platform to vent, post hateful comments, spread gossip. Something about not having to see the world face to face but still speak your mind gives freedom. Freedom to, if not managed wisely, say and do things you would never take the liberty to do in real life. Because it’s easy to hide behind a phone/computer.

When cell phones are the life line of our teenagers we have got to recognize the dangers about them and take steps to guard against it for ourselves and on behalf of our kids. Randy and I are still a ways away from dealing with our own kids and cell phones but we’re working this through in our heads now. It has made me more aware of my own cell phone use. The other night at dinner out Mitchell said, “Mom, you have got to get more games on your phone. Can I just at least play with your phone while we wait for our food?” I told him I left it in the car on purpose and was trying not to take it with me everywhere I go because I want to fight against being on the phone when I’m with our family. That being with each other and talking to each other instead of having our heads in our phones is something I am working on. Therefore, no cell phones at the dinner table. No pretend phones either, since Sophie is all into her fake phone. See…..addicted before she even has one! I want to bring my kids in on these conversations because I want them to learn cell phone etiquette and I don’t want them to be sucked into the addictive tendencies these phones can have on us.

So I’m not sure what our boundaries will look like for our kids when they get cell phones but I know there will be restrictions. We will want to be fair and help instill independence but at the same time protect from the pitfalls that are all over the place with these phones.

Some basic ground rules that I’ve seen and find reasonable are:

No phone use at the dinner table
Turn the phone off at night
Not taking the phone to the bedroom at night
Parents check phone and read text messages periodically
Monitored texting (the amount and what goes out)

Got any phone advice?

Preacher Funnies & Bloopers

2011-11-13T05:04:00.001-08:00

We had been at our church plant for about a year and it was a Friday night when we had a couple come and sing for us after having dinner together as a church. Randy was sitting next to a woman who had been visiting our church for a little while. We didn’t know her very well but we were getting to know her more and we were so glad she came to this church event. One of the songs the couple sang was talking about the mountains and valleys of life. The woman next to us had tears streaming down her face and Randy could see how touched she was by the song. He sort of patted her back to give comfort as he was sure the Holy Spirit was moving in her heart. She looked up at Randy and said, “Elvis used to sing that song!” and she just started bawling over remembering Elvis.

And we came away thinking never underestimate the power of the king of rock and roll. Ha!

Sometimes we’ll look at each other and say, “Elvis used to sing that” and just laugh out loud.

3 steps to surviving Christmas with no debt

2011-11-12T06:33:00.001-08:00

1) Set aside money all year long for that one day a year

This is the system we’ve used for 18 years now. A coupon holder with file folder stickers to cover up the other words. Of course this system isn’t anything new and many people use online budgeting tools but I do better with this method. It’s old school but I’m very tangible. I still have a day timer even though I have apps that could tell me what to do every single minute of the day. Maybe it’s an addiction to paper or something. Anyways, we have two of these coupon holders. One has our every day categories like groceries, household, eating out, etc. The other one contains more of our categories that we don’t access regularly but save up over time (Christmas, Doctor, Dry Cleaning, Hair Cuts, etc). When the time comes we have accumulated enough money to cover the expense at hand or at least offset the cost. We take out a certain amount of cash on the first of every month. That amount gets dispersed into all our cash categories. Our fixed expenses (power bill, house payment, cell phone, etc) are paid with our checking account. Of course your fixed expenses will determine the amount of money you are able to allot to your cash categories. And this isn’t determined every month. It works best to sit down every year and look at income and past expenses and what’s coming up to determine what your budget will be for that next year. And then stick to it!

2) Stick to your budget amount for your child/ren even when you’re dying to buy them everything they want

Isn’t this where we usually get into trouble? We want to give our children good gifts and lots of them. It doesn’t help that we are surrounded by retailers marketing and seducing our children into a world of materialism. Commercials invading our “wanters”. When I was a kid and would whine and say ‘I want….’ this or that, my Mom would say, “Sounds like someone needs to get her wanter fixed.” Have you noticed that walking into a store to get a loaf of bread is like entering a toy store now? Stores are lining up their entrances and borders of their stores with a gazillion toys so your children can be wanting them all. And so we can be buying them all.

Having an amount already designated for each child will allow you to spend less because you know your boundaries. This budget amount is not based on what you would like to spend on your child because we’d all like to spend a million bucks on them. Instead the amount is based on what you have to spend. This takes discipline at Christmas time. And it can be hard. For instance, I’m dying to get Sophie a battery powered Barbie four wheeler. She loves riding toys and she would absolutely love this one I’ve had my eye on even though it’s not even close to her budget amount. And one day I was at Walmart and I had this thought of “Who cares that it’s not in our budget. I want her to have one and what’s the big deal if we pay it off in a few months. We’ve never done that in our lives so this time shouldn’t hurt.” Then I realized how ridiculous it would be to defy the very principles that have kept us living debt free for 18 years. Walking away from the Barbie four wheeler I felt a tinge of “it’s not fair” talk coming into my head. I quickly told God I did not want to be that person and to help me not be that girl. Because God loves to give good gifts to His children and He has for me and our family. I am so thankful for what He has given us and to look at what others have or what we cannot have is a slap in our Provider’s face. His hand of provision is sufficient. And I want my kids to know this too. If I buy them everything they want then they will think we are sufficient enough, when we aren’t, to give them everything they want.

3) Serve more, spend less

Ask God to give your family an opportunity to serve someone this Christmas season. Serving others, especially those who are hungry, hurting and homeless, changes perspective. It opens eyes wide to the reality that relationships and God’s love far outlasts Barbie’s four wheeler and Legos on any given day.

What if you haven’t been saving all year or a major set back like unemployment or a medical expense took all the Christmas money?

If this is your case, I’m so sorry. I know there are many people who are struggling with this right now and it can feel so defeating.

My advice would be to still not go in debt over Christmas gifts. Yes, you could pay it off next year but then you’re not saving next year and you are repeating the vicious cycle of debt. It might mean a difficult conversation with your family about how this year will be different from the other years. That there won’t be as many gifts. Get creative and ask God to give your family a special time together on Christmas morning doing new and inexpensive things: games, puzzles, scavenger hunt with the few presents you do give. There are creative ways to make something small and simple really fun. We did a family fun weekend this weekend and we didn’t have the money to go to a hotel like we normally do once a year (a big car expense came up that was bigger than our car budget category) but we did other things. We had dinner every night in the dining room instead of the kitchen. I made “tickets” out of construction paper that “entitled them to a free prize out of the prize bag” and put them under their dinner plates. It took two seconds to make these and they loved this. They got to leave the meal to go snag a free prize (which is made up of .50 toys in the mark down bin from Toys R Us after Christmas Sale) which is usually earned from doing a weeks worth of chores. Then I made a ticket for them and put in their chair entitling them to movie night on pallets in our bedroom. We bought Chronicles of Narnia and watched that. These were ways we cut our expenses down but still had so much fun. Our kids responded to this and we enjoyed our time together. And it was never even brought up that we didn’t go to a hotel this time. We just had fun in a different way and it wasn’t a big deal.

God will provide for us. He is Jehovah Jireh, our Provider. It might look different and might not include the electronic device we were hoping to purchase for our spouse or child. But it will be sufficient. What we think is just “horrible” many times will end in something beautiful when we are seeking Him in the midst of it all. So I pray over our finances today and ask God to give wisdom and discipline to all of us as we honor Him in our spending. And I ask that He provide exactly what we need when we need it. That our hearts will respond in thankfulness. Amen.

Family Weekend

2011-11-11T04:43:00.001-08:00

We go through spurts like everyone does where life is crazy hectic and we just need to take a breath and be together as a family. Special time together. Sometimes it’s needed away from home and we’ll get a hotel and let the kids go swimming and do something fun during the day like visit a children’s museum or catch a movie. Other times we hang close to home but do nothing but play games, chill and do fun stuff. And such is our weekend this weekend. Yesterday was a half day at school so we started our long family weekend with a trip to Toys and Co. This is the best ever toy store and our family loves this place. Both the kids had a little money saved up and we let them spend it there. Then we went to see Puss in Boots. And then we had dinner at our favorite place in Greensboro: Mellow Mushroom. It was a great day. Since there is no school today we are sleeping in and we plan to enjoy our downtown area….antique stores, the bike shop, bakery, etc. We’ll play some UNO, Headbands, and Spot it, our favorite games, and probably watch a movie at home together. I’m pretty sure the kids will talk us into making a pallet on our bedroom floor and we’ll all sleep in Saturday morning. The sleeping in part might be a little over zealous. We’ll see.

P.S. I’m sort of excited about today being 11-11-11 just because of how fun it is to write that. Even typing 11-11-11 is sort of crazy fun. Makes me want to go write a check just so I can write out those numbers one more time. Ha! Not really.

Like Mother like Daughter and I need your help

2011-11-10T05:37:00.001-08:00

I was cooking dinner and having a serious conversation with Randy when I turned around and caught a glimpse of Sophie reading with these glasses on. We had a laugh attack right there over the cooking noodles. We had no clue she was wearing them. And she never made a sound or anything. Just wore them. Evidently this is becoming a tradition because we are on day three of nerd glasses and reading. Ha! Ha!

What’s so funny? she asks

Well, what’s so funny is that these were my favorite glasses growing up. I would wear my nerd glasses on the way to school. By myself. At stop lights I would pick my fake nose and be all serious about it. It was when I was wearing these glasses that I got pulled over for speeding on my way to school one morning. I was speeding in a school zone which was really stupid. But what was stupider was when I didn’t take the glasses off when the officer came up to the window. And even more stupidestest than that was how excited I got that the officer gave me a “citation” which I thought was just a “warning”. I cheerfully thanked the officer and bragged to my friends that I got out of a ticket and got a citation instead. That’s when my friends explained to me the word citation. And that pretty much ruined my day. So me and these glasses go way back to lots of memories. Some great and some not so great.

But all in all it makes me proud that my little one is following in her Mamma’s steps, totally unsolicited. Okay, so maybe I hide pairs of nerd glasses around the house in hope that my kids will just happen to pick them up and wear them, but other than that it’s not like I force them or anything. Aren’t I such a mature Mommy?

Wearing Groucho Marx glasses can actually be therapeutic. For a five year old doing some reading, it can make them feel mature and grown up. And for the forty wearing them at the stoplight, it suddenly flashes back memories of the good ole’ days….where you do silly things, wear crazy stuff and set aside maturity and grown up-ness. Well, I just guess it does. This is unsubstantiated in my case since I haven’t worn my Groucho Marx glasses in decades but after reading this post I just might try this form of therapy over the weekend because I haven’t done anything silly or crazy in a very long time!!!!! I’m so glad I read my own writing or else I might risk being extremely boring, or insane.

Oh, and about this blogging daily thing……is hard! But I’m trying real hard to stick with it. I’m feeling very narcissistic though because I’m resorting to doing a lot of writing about myself because I know myself pretty well and it’s easy to write about what you know about. Plus, if I write daily I might win a door prize which I never ever win. Ever. But I’m hanging on to the fact that I just might be the ONE out of thousands of millions that might be picked. I think I heard that if you wear Groucho Marx glasses you increase your chances of winning stuff. Yeah, pretty sure that’s true.

So, I know this sounds even more vain but if there is a topic you would like to hear about from my limited & weird perspective, on this blog, would you leave a comment and let me know. I’m getting sick of hearing about myself on this blog. It must change. And the sooner the better because there’s a lot more of November left. So I’m risking nobody responding and feeling like a complete and total NERD^glasses(like that subliminal advertisement?) but I could really use your help, as my readers, in knowing what you’d like to hear about in this space. I’m willing to share more about myself if there’s something specific you’d like to know but I am really just curious what it is you would like to read about.

Thanks for your help! And I’ll tell you how my Groucho Marx wearing days go if I get the nerve to do it this weekend And I triple dog dare you to go out and get a pair…..Dollar Tree has the best ones…..the kind you wind up and the mustache moves back and forth. Oh yes, they do! I have them in my laundry room as I type. Bought them but too mature to wear them. I’ll grow up one day and sport those suckers!

Naughty Pilgrim Party

2011-11-09T03:04:00.001-08:00

Okay, so get your mind out of the gutter and think “white elephant gift/dirty santa” but in November and that’s what a Naughty Pilgrim Party is. Our Busy Mom’s Night Out group had our Naughty Pilgrim Party last night and it was so much fun.

The all around best gift was this half eaten box of Russell Stover chocolates with a picture of the girl eating one of the chocolates. Too funny!!!!! She won the door prize for the best gift given.

Of course you could also try to find a belly dancing kit at a garage sale like I did for $3 and give as a gift. It was a hit too. And the girl who won it is going away on a wedding anniversary trip this weekend. We were kidding her all night about it. Said we were going to be tapping our fingers (like the belly dancers do with their little finger bells) at her husband on Sunday morning as a subtle reminder that we knew all about her new dancing trade. Ha! What a great sport she was. You know, I think I forgot to tell everyone that I found that at a garage sale and that it wasn’t like really MY belly dancing kit. Oh, nice. That’s just awkward now that I think about it. Oh well. I really don’t think they thought I was on my way to being a belly dancer when God intervened and called us to be the pastor of their church. Ha! Really now, I don’t think I have to worry.

Of course someone had to get the total T tacky item and this night it was the plum colored elf boots votive candle holder. It was bad good. Really bad, good.

And then we had three gifts of the same thing..….. that POO-POURRI spray that is fabulous. If you don’t have any you gotta get some. It is the best stuff. I won’t go into detail but you spray the toilet bowl before you…… “go” and the next person never knows you “went”. We all kept fighting over it. We played where you could steal someone’s gift instead of opening a gift and that’s why it’s called “naughty” because you steal other people’s gifts.

Some of the other gifts were trinketedy Goodwill items and other fun stuff. One gift was hysterical and all had us thinking in the totally wrong direction but ended up being something completely different. Too funny!!!

We did this most of the night:

I love that kind of laughter. It does a soul good.

What was your best ever white elephant gift…….. received or given?

Jobs, Business After Hours and the Nudist Colony Lady

2011-11-08T04:23:00.001-08:00

My employment history is really quite interesting since it never really had anything to do with my college degree. All I ever wanted to be from the time I was a kid was to be a Social Worker. I got to college and my advisor said that I would really need a Masters degree to do what I really wanted to do with social work so I decided to get a degree in Elementary Education. I knew that Randy would be getting MA in Bible and we couldn’t both be working on a Master’s besides the fact that I was still in shock that I actually made it through college and the thought of more school might have kept me in an academic induced coma. I loved my education classes and even loved student teaching third grade. I looked for a teaching job in the public school system upon graduation but couldn’t find one and God in His goodness allowed me to land a job with an Adult Day Care Center where I worked with families admitting their parents into our program. We were like a day care center for the elderly without the see-saws and swings.

We provided therapy through an outpatient rehab and we served meals and organized activities. I LOVED this job. My heart has always been drawn to elderly people from the time I was a kid. I used to stay up on Friday nights making cards out of construction paper and then would have my parents drop me off at the nursing home so I could visit my “friends” and then they’d come back and pick me up. One time I came in my ballet leotard and danced for my sweet audience. Ha! It was hilarious because at the time I was skin and bones and all legs practically. Picture a gangly string bean jumping and spinning around to an Amy Grant tape blaring so loud that it was pure static. Those poor sweet elderly residents needed a double dose of blood pressure meds after I left. So this particular job was a dream job for me…..just without the leg warmers and leotards.

Later when we moved the Lord opened up a door for me to work in our local Department of Family and Children Services which was another incredible experience for me. My position was like a liaison between our welfare recipients and our business community. This was the first time I experienced what the Chamber of Commerce was like and networking and all that good stuff. I felt so grown up going to my first “business after hours”. I even wore a dark blue dress suit to top off the new professionalism I was entering. We all wore name tags with our name and the business we worked for. The first person I met had the title “Serendipity” under her name. So like all the other professionals, I asked assertively, “So tell me about Serendipity, I’ve not heard of that before.” She said, “Oh, it’s the nudist colony in White County.” I almost spit out my punch and roared with laughter. I made a comment that just dug me deeper in the hole I was about to bury myself in. The serious face and the next comment she made told me there indeed was a nudist colony in my new hometown and she was the representative. I could’ve sworn she was wearing clothes when I first spoke to her but I was too scared to move my eyes below hers at this point to confirm such a thing. I stammered, fell all over my words and turned ten shades of red. Finally the conversation ended and I felt out of breath and extremely unprofessional. Oh well, there were more chances to recover my declining professionalism. In this particular job I helped nonworking individuals get job ready, land and keep a job. This was incredibly challenging at times but I learned a lot and God gave me some amazing opportunities to share Christ with my clients. Not really what you’re supposed to do at state job but I was discrete about it but I also knew there could be a high price to pay for it and I was willing to pay that cost. Through this job Randy and I were able to implement and strengthen a mentoring program in our public schools. We recruited and trained adults to be mentors for students in our schools. It was a great program that was already in place but just needed someone to pick up the ball and restructure it. I started mentoring my student in Kindergarten and went to her High School graduation two years ago. We still have a strong relationship and she’s like a daughter to us.

I look back at my jobs and see how God’s hand was on me through each of them. He knew my desire to serve Him and He knew my desire to work in social work. I never thought it could work out but it did. And I’d say to anyone young adult out there who is seeking God while trying to figure out what to study or what career to pursue…….seeking counsel from your advisors and wise people is great but know that ultimately, it is God who places you in the environment He wants you in. And He will prepare you for that. The key is to seek Him first and not be so focused on the specific “degree” or “certificate” or “experience”.

But my all time favorite dream job would be one of two things:

1) A candid camera person

2) A mystery shopper

What was your favorite job? And what would your dream job be?

A pencil in the hand of God

2011-11-07T02:58:00.001-08:00

I am a little pencil in the hand of God who is sending a love letter to the world. –Mother Teresa

I have been intrigued with Katie, from Uganda. Have you seen her blog or heard of what she’s doing? If not, you need to ditch this post and go read a girl who has given up her life to serve others out of her love for Jesus. She’s like a modern day Mother Teresa and I don’t mean that in a dramatic way. She really is. When I hear this quote by Mother Teresa I think of Katie and what she’s doing. But then I am quickly reminded of my own life and what message it is that I am sending to the world around me. I’m not always convinced it’s a love letter. My life doesn’t have to be Katie’s life or Mother Teresa’s life but it should resemble Christ’s life, one in which was spent loving His Father, doing His will and loving others. That’s what a Christian is. One who is like Christ. As I examine my own life I know I have a lot of sharpening to do. Refining of self. Shedding of pride and selfishness. And I leave this post in prayerful confession to God and a desire to be held by Him and used in whatever way He desires. Not to be Katie or Mother Teresa but Melody, a girl in his grip, willing to write a love letter as messy as it may be some days.

Linking with Michelle at Graceful today.

Church Signs and Bulletin Mishaps

2011-11-06T06:18:00.001-08:00

And what about those church bulletin mishaps…..

Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
--------------------------
Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
--------------------------
For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
--------------------------
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
--------------------------
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
--------------------------
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow..
--------------------------
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
--------------------------
Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
--------------------------
Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
--------------------------
Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
--------------------------
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you.
--------------------------
I can’t say I’ve ever been in a church with one of these bulletin mishaps although I do think it would be hilarious. I’m picturing the elbowing and silent snickers that would take place across the congregation. I’m not sure I’d be so subtle about it as much as I’d try to be. We have a few of our own funny church mishaps and funny stuff. I’ll come back and share those next Sunday. They’re not super funny like a lady losing her wig while getting baptized or anything like that. I think those stories are either made up or come from veteran preachers who are 105 years old and still preaching.

Hope you and your family have a great day and if you went to church and had a funny bulletin announcement please share it with us!

Pumpkin Patch with Preschoolers

2011-11-05T06:17:00.001-07:00

Randy and I got to go on Sophie’s field trip together and it was so much fun. Probably one of the best field trips yet. I was so impressed with the preschool teachers because it was a well organized trip but we also had enough flexibility to be with our kids and do what we wanted to do around the farm.

The hayride was gorgeous!

Sophie loved milking this cow…….how is it that the name “Mae” is in almost every herd of cows?

And this cow ride was the bomb!!!! Randy cringed when Sophie happened to sit in the cow car named “Gator” because he is a huge GA fan and his Dad is a Gator fan. The Gator chomp did it in for him. But there are worse things in life…….

Like having to be the cow in a farm animal line up…..

Haaaa!!!!! Haaaa!!!!! I love this picture. It’s so funny because doesn’t it represent us as adults at times? The kids are slap happy and loving life in the current situation and then there’s us. Randy is such a good sport and he’s totally putting on in this picture.

See, he really is a good sport. He plays hard with the kids and gets excited with them. I’m usually the dead beat when it comes to stuff like this…..and I blame it on being the photographer.

Story time was really cool at the log cabin and she even brought out the bunnies for the kids to pet.

This is how Sophie felt about the day and so did we!

I know it has probably felt like family scrapbook day for the last few days but part of my blog serves as preservation of our family memories so I have to put up special events. Sorry if you get bored. I’m resisting the sassy urge to say “but it is my blog and I can do what I want”.

“She growed up”

2011-11-04T02:13:00.001-07:00

I loved this phrase coming out of my three year old’s mouth and I’m slightly sad that she knows the right way to say it now. She was three yesterday and five this week. And we celebrated in a few different ways. First we had pancakes for breakfast.

These eyes scream, “I’m so embarrassed but okay, I’ll wear the funny hat because I know I probably won’t get to open my presents if I don’t.” And how right she is. The tradition stands in our family that you must wear the birthday hat on your birthday if you want to see any presents. Insert cheesy grin :)

We opened gifts and her kitchen was a favorite. Mitchell stayed up late putting it together which he was extremely proud of.

While he and Randy were up late working on the kitchen I was in my real kitchen working on the cake. This was hanging heavy over my head because for the last three years in a row Sophie has had this cake:

I’m not kidding. That exact cake is what her Grandmother has bought her for the last three years because it’s what she wanted and we were in Atlanta celebrating her birthday. But this year I couldn’t afford to get that cake and do the other things we were planning on doing. So I found a $10 Rapunzel play set at Walmart and decided to make my own cake. It was sort of disastrous in more ways than one but I’ll just leave the picture to speak for itself. It wasn’t too bad but it certainly didn’t get the awe factor, squeal appeal or jumping up and down that the other cake got for the last three years. Oh well. That’s okay. She liked it and Mitchell was pretty impressed…..with the boat. Sigh.

My Mom came up for Sophie’s birthday this year and it was really fun having her. We didn’t tell the kids she was coming and when Mom knocked on the door and Sophie went to answer it she just screamed and jumped up and down over and over again and it was just priceless. Sort of like what she didn’t do when she saw her cake. But I’m not bitter or anything.

Sophie and her bestie went to Build-a-Bear and they had a ball. It was so much fun. Then we came home and the girls played.

Good ole’ fashion coloring fun!

Out of all the birthday pictures, this one is my favorite. Sophie’s expression reveals her excitement in turning five. She could not wait to see how much she had grown and to mark it on the wall. She was convinced all her growth happened between her last night of being four and her first morning of being five.

We each went around the table and said five things that we loved about Sophie and she ate this up. She would add to each person’s five things and finally I said, “Honey, would you like a turn?” I was joking but she said, “Yes, I would.” When we all had said our five things she took her turn. She stood up as if she was about to give a speech and started off by saying, “I’d like to say that God created everything and I love Him and He is so good. He is my God.” I’m all beaming proud of my theologically sound five year old when Mitchell pipes up and says, “Soph, you’re not even a Christian yet.” I give him the look but it didn’t seem to bother Sophie and she starts into her own five things that she loves about herself. Oh boy, at least we don’t have self esteem issues at this point! I love this though…..that she frames her “favorite things about me” with God. He created her so why shouldn’t she be excited about her own five things, right?

My five things:

Sophie, you are kind; you are sweet; you are smart; you love Jesus and you love pink.

Happy Birthday baby girl. I love you!

Twisted Truth

2011-11-03T04:11:00.001-07:00

We’re doing a study at church right now called Twisted Truth by Andy Stanley and it’s about how distorted the truth becomes as satan works his deceiving power. I couldn’t help but think about these things as I read an article today about a lesbian high school couple who are running for homecoming King and Queen. Rebeca Arellano has already been voted and announced “homecoming king” by her high school classmates. You can read the article below in purple that I cut and pasted from here. What’s strikes me most in this entire article is the last statement made by a fellow student.

I’ll pick back up my thoughts at the end of the article.

During a pep rally at Patrick Henry High School Friday, senior Rebeca Arellano was announced as the school's homecoming king.

Happy is the head that wears the crown.

San Diego area high school senior and self-identified lesbian Rebeca Arellano has been voted homecoming king by her fellow Patrick Henry High school peers

Her girlfriend Haileigh Adams has been nominated for homecoming queen.

Arellano told KGTV that entire situation feels like something out of a dream. After all, she and her girlfriend hadn’t even planned on running for the titles.

"They were chanting my name and it was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had," she said.

Both she and girlfriend Adams say that they’ve been overwhelmed by the kind support of their friends, family and schoolmates.

"We don't know if we're going to win," Haileigh said Thursday. "We're not sure, but if we do, it would be an amazing gesture to the LGBT community and everything that we stand for."

Still, not everyone is happy. There were a few guys who had their eyes on the homecoming king crown.

"Any of the guys are not happy about me running because I'm taking a guy's place, but if there was any other way to do it and have two lesbians that are a couple win, I would," Arellano aid.

For other students stillexamining their sexuality, the win meant a lot more than just a moment in the sun at a yearly dance.

"I'm actually bi myself," a student named Gladys said. "It makes me think that you can be more open and stuff, and the way the school's reacting to it, like, positively … It makes you more comfortable in the school, and in your environment."

I’m sad, not shocked, that a school is supporting this idea that a girl can take the place of a guy’s title and it be okay. And not only okay but very positive and supportive. It’s not right, in my opinion, that they are supporting the concept that if you don’t like the reality of your sexual orientation then you can just change that by doing a few things differently.

The support from the school giving this one student (and most likely a lot more) a feeling of being more open and comfortable in her own bisexuality is the perfect example of how twisting the truth grows in stages. It’s true. We do feel more comfortable when we feel supported and encouraged in our sinful ways. It’s natural to feel justified when our environment is conducive and accepting. I don’t know this girl but I picture a student who, after watching the positive reception of this homecoming king deal, is now feeling more power and freedom in her pursuit of relationships outside the natural design of God’s plan. I realize that a school doesn’t have to support something like this homecoming situation to give liberty for someone to pursue or give in to homosexual relationships. I just regret that the school administration in this case is coming along side of this and adding to the lie that it really is okay to embrace your sexual preferences even if, or especially when, it contradicts the way God created us to be.

The world’s compass is not God’s word and so the reality of this article, and much worse things, can’t really rock our world because what do we expect when we look to our own desires and feelings as our moral guide. We end up with a school having two girls as homecoming king and queen. Well, maybe. I guess that’s still to be voted on.

This is why I’m reminded how imperative it is that we train our kids early in the truth of God’s Word. Teaching them that our framework for life must be built on a relationship with Jesus and the truth of His word. Even the parts that “feel” contrary to our very core and how we were made. So that when they/we face subtle and glaring lies of the enemy we can recognize it and pray for victory. In regards to homosexuality, for some people this is much harder because there might be an inborn propensity towards same sex relationships. I’m not ready to say there’s a “gay gene” but I do think some people have more of a struggle with this than others. And this is why I think our kids need to understand truth based on God’s word early on. They need to hear/understand/know that they were created in God’s image and with a specific purpose and design and it includes their gender. If a boy has an overwhelming strong desire to be a girl instead of being a boy, it’s still not a mistake that they are a boy. God was fully aware in the midst of His forming and weaving of that child the sex of that child. And it might take really hard work to accept and embrace their sexuality but there is help and support out there for working through those difficult issues. Exodus International is a fabulous resource. Alan Chambers, the president of Exodus, is a friend of mine. We went on a mission trip together when we were in high school and his testimony is amazing. He shares openly about his struggle against homosexuality, even as a Christian. He has such grace and compassion while sharing with others that there is a way out of this lifestyle. He spoke at our church a few years back and Randy and I and our people just loved him. If you’re reading this and you or someone you know struggles in this area know that there is help out there.

I struggle in posting this. Because I know some people are really mad and think I’m being judgmental, condescending and hypocritical at this point. I’ve made some mistakes in talking about issues like this before. My approach has not always been tactful and I have had to apologize for that in the past. I’ve lost a friendship over this issue…….and maybe more of how I handled the topic more than the issue itself. I really hate that because I don’t want to be that girl. Believe it or not, I am slower to speak now because of it.

So why bring up a topic like this on a public blog?

Because I feel passionate that as Christians in a world that is twisting and ignoring truth daily we must be on guard. Instead of getting outraged at an article like this and throw up our hands, pull our kids out of public school and go back to living in a bubble, lets be reminded to train in the Truth and to share it in love. To offer hope in Jesus Christ because there is hope there.

The dreaded 25 random things about me

2011-11-02T03:30:00.001-07:00

25 random things you may not care to know about me:

1. I have a really good English accent that I whip out every now and then

2. April Fool’s Day is my favorite day of the year

3. If I thought I could endure the pain I would have a tattoo of a butterfly representing my new life in Christ

4. Sometimes women drive me crazy even though I am one

5. Not telling where I’d put the butterfly tattoo

6. In fourth grade I was called “carpet legs” because of how hairy my legs were. Shut.up.

7. This is obviously an old “about me” list because I just got a tattoo 8 weeks ago. It wasn’t a butterfly.

8. I love old people

9. I grew up going to the Waffle House with my parents

10. I don’t care what people think

11. I played six seasons of soccer

12. Pink is my favorite color

13. I once lost my tutu during a ballet performance. Maybe I should have stuck with #11

14. I learned to water ski when I was 8 years old

15. Our dog when I was a kid learned to bobsled when he was 4 years old

16. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” is a favorite verse of mine that got me through difficult school days

17. The most “heap-a trouble” I remember getting into was when I shot a firecracker off in typing class in my tiny Christian high school.

18. I love to laugh and play jokes on people. I take too much delight in other people being the brunt of a great joke.

19. Funky toe socks are a part of my wardrobe in the winter

20. I adore my family

21. Once I cried my way out of a $200+ speeding ticket

22. I love to dress up for Halloween. I was a bat last year….and the 2 years before. I need to move on this year.

23. I love to throw a good party

24. On the back of my neck and it’s the Hebrew word Elohim meaning “God our Creator”, the tattoo, that is.

25. My best friend and I met in third grade and have been best friends ever since

Okay, that was way too much about me. I’d love to hear a few things about YOU. I dare you to leave two weird things about yourself in the comments below. You don’t have to attach your name. You can say, “I wear polka dot underwear every day” ~Anonymous

NaBloPoMo for the first time!

2011-11-01T03:49:00.001-07:00

I know, I know…..what the heck is that mumble jumble? It stands for National Blog Posting Month and it’s where bloggers commit to daily blogging for an entire month. I’ve always said I would never do that but here I am doing what I said I’d never do. How is it I find myself there more often than not? I’m really having a hard time picturing me blogging on Thanksgiving Day or the days leading up to it but I’m going to go for it. There are very few things I discipline myself to do on a daily basis so this will be interesting. I try real hard to eat chocolate every day as a discipline but unfortunately even that doesn’t always happen.

I’d love it if you’d join me on this proposed daily blogging journey. Please join the conversation by leaving a comment. Anyone and and everyone is welcome here, even if you don’t agree with the things being said, just please be nice when contributing your thoughts. Many of you have said you have a hard time signing in to leave a comment. I’m sorry about that and I’m not sure what the deal is with that. Signing up with Google is supposed to be easy and it’s certainly free. Sometimes you do have to enter your info. twice especially if you’re new to commenting here at Life is a Bowl of Wedgies but once you’re in the system it becomes easier to comment. You can always post as “Anonymous” and leave your name in the comment if you want. I hear from readers that it’s easier that way for some reason.

Well, enough bloggy business: here are some Halloween pictures from last night…….

We started out with dinner semi-spooky style and the kids loved this. It really wasn’t that much but just eating in the dining room was different and fun.

And then we carved our pumpkin. Well, Randy carved the pumpkin because he is the master carver. And he did it in like 20 minutes. I was totally impressed. It would take me that long just to sketch a stick figure pumpkin.

And then we took the proverbial front porch picture……Mitchell is a ninja and Sophie is Dorothy. She did the girly squeal when I gave her the red sparkly shoes today.

And then I got as musical as I ever get outside my name and broke out in a little monster mash madness…….this is my bat hat that I wear over and over every single Halloween. It’s just too fun to put to rest quite yet.

And then Sophie got all set up on the front porch to hand out candy.

We ran out of candy in 40 minutes and then went to our church for Trunk or Treat which was really fun. We have a youth house and they turned it into Alice in Wonderland (Johnny Depp version) and it was so cool. My pictures didn’t turn out good unfortunately but I’m posting what I’ve got.

And finally…..sweeter than any piece of chocolate delight you ever put in your pumpkin is this picture of Sophie and her friend from preschool.

Hope you had a fun Halloween!

See ya tomorrow……hopefully I won’t be resorting to dumb blond jokes or pictures of my toenails by the fourth day in a row. Ha! I’ll spare you, I promise. I’ll give up before I post just to post. Promise.

A Halloween devotional

2011-10-28T14:19:00.001-07:00

Okay, I’m sorry but this is a bit sarcastic. I don’t really have a Halloween devotional because I don’t feel like Halloween is any more evil than today is or yesterday was. Sometimes we think Halloween is “the devil’s day” and we get all freaked out about this day. We prey on people who dress up as skeletons as the perfect target for a gospel tract and an invite to the church’s showing of Left Behind. Do I have a problem with showing Christian movies, preaching and giving out tracts on Halloween? Well. Not exactly, but I do think it’s odd if we come out of our Christian shells on this particular night but go back in them and never speak of Christ to the people we actually do life with at the office and in our communities. If we’re using Halloween as a chance to hide behind our Christian costumes to share the Gospel then we’re totally missing it. Okay, I’m done. Sorry about that. I know that got sort of whatevery. But I just have a bit of a Halloween hang-up.

This is how I really feel about Halloween.

Halloween is one of my most favorite holidays because I LOVE to dress up. Love it. Last year I was a Nun and Randy was Elvis. He was a reluctant Elvis but he was one nonetheless. After he got his hair did he really got into character and it was hilarious. Mitchell was a clone trooper and Sophie was Snow White. This year I’m back to the bat hat that I’ve worn for the last ten years due to respect for the budget. And I would feel guilty telling the kids they couldn’t dress up because Mommy wanted to be a Whoopee Cushion for Halloween leaving them to wearing a cute but boring pumpkin shirt and jeans. What I really want is this totally awesome head band that speaksa my language.

I found one in town but it’s a whoppin’ $28 for that thing! I even went in and asked if he would be marking them down a few days before Halloween but nope, they weren’t.

But my bat hat and I have gone through lots of years together so I’m actually looking forward to wearing it on Monday night since I abandoned it last year for the Nun. I’ll post pictures of it when I put up pics of the kids. Sophie will be Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and Mitchell has changed his mind every day on what he wants to be. So we’re still figuring it out. I keep wishing for a ghost so we can just pull his top sheet off his bed and whack some black eyeballs on it or something. Like the good ole days.

I’m too scared to ask if you’re trick or treating this year.

But lets just ask this: If you were a heathen trick or treater, what would you dress up as?

Prayer Wars

2011-10-25T08:05:00.001-07:00

Every time I brag on my kids on this blog the other shoe quickly drops. Yesterday I bragged about Mitchell’s awesome theological nativity scene complete with the title “Feliz Navidad” which was pretty impressive to me and his Dad. But literally as soon as I puff up about that I hear he and Sophie fighting over prayer at breakfast. It started with Mitchell accusing Sophie of not praying before she ate her first bite of her cereal. She swears she prayed in her head. But her brother doubts this. They continue fighting over it and then Sophie says, “FINE, I’ll pray out loud.” Mitchell then gets mad because he wants to be the one to pray. But Sophie just starts praying out loud leaving Mitchell frustrated but not able to say anything since she is over there waxing eloquent. And I mean she really is going at it. She is praying about ev-er-rey-thing. Thanking God for the flowers, the petals on the flowers, the stems on the flowers, the inside and the outside of the flowers. The world. The whole world. The world we live in. Oh yes, I’m serious. I’m very bothered by this as I listen to the whole thing go down but don’t really know what to say. When she finishes Mitchell pipes in without skipping a beat. He offers his own prayer in which he intercedes on behalf of his sister and her need for kindness and not so annoyingness. Were my kids really attacking each other through prayer?!? Yes, they were! And I’m still sitting here wondering how to approach this. The morning was slammed with making lunches, reviewing for two make up tests and getting books packed so I didn’t address it but I plan to this afternoon.

Are the pastor’s kids the only ones who use prayer as a venue for getting revenge?

Don’t answer that.

Signatures and Theological Art

2011-10-24T05:39:00.001-07:00

Sophie is in that stage where she has just about mastered the spelling of her name and she writes it everywhere and all the time. And this is why I have a cute story to share today.

Sophie came to me in a soft whisper and said, “I have something to show you but it’s a secret.” She showed me Madeline’s puppy dog and where she had drawn in washable marker a smiley face on the tag. I smiled and half mindlessly said, “that’s cute, Sophie.” A few minutes later she came to me and held up Madeline in front of my face. Again I said, “Yep, she’s a cute little doll.” And then she lifted Madeline’s red yarn bangs and showed me her signature. She looked at me bright eyed and said, “Shhhh, it’s a secret.” I had to grin at the cleverness of the placement of her signature. What a keepsake and now we have a doll that will never enter a garage sale over my dead body. Of course we had to take it one scary step further and match the doll……

I know, I know….I shouldn’t have encouraged that because now her name is most likely going to appear on a wall somewhere in the house. I still think that would actually be cute but I did give her the “only on paper/don’t destroy property” talk. The other thing I’m thinking we’re close to is her cutting her bangs. She hates the feel of her bangs on her forehead. We got them cut the other day and she has been begging me to let her get them cut all the way to the top of her head. Of course she has no idea what she’s talking about and how ridiculous that would look so I’m trying hard to explain to her by showing her my bangs and that she has to grow them out but that it takes a looooong time and is a pain in the batookey to do. I’ve not said, “Don’t ever cut your hair” and I don’t really want to say that to her but I’m sort of just feeling like the day is coming soon where she tries it. If it was a little chunk it would probably be cute but with as confident as Sophie is I feel like she’d sit herself in a chair in front of the mirror and just go for a totally new hairstyle. Who knows. But you can know for sure I’ll post pictures of any cosmetology attempts on behalf of the Sophers!

Ha! Sophie just looked at this picture of herself and sighed real deep and said, “Ughhhh, you made the ‘S’ that way??!!??

And this is why she said that……

Love this backwards “S” in Sophie’s name. She was devastated when I had to break it to her that it was backwards. She cried seriously defeated tears. It was almost like she was embarrassed that she had been spelling it wrong for the last few weeks. We tried to make a correct “S” but it’s still hard for her to do. I tried to console her that it was okay because she’s still learning. I even resorted to using the plate I made in first grade with messed up letters as an example but she wasn’t too comforted by that. She looked at me like, “Dudette, you needed some serious help if you were in first grade and still couldn’t get letters right!” Oh well, at least I tried to make her feel better.

And can I share one more piece of art with you?

This is Mitchell’s Christmas Card he created for our school fundraiser. It is the nativity scene complete with the phonetic spelling of “Feliz Navidad”. His art teacher pulled Randy aside and said, “I had to show this to you because it’s so Mitchell.” I’m so glad she appreciates Mitchell’s creative flare. I’m especially liking God the Spirit riding the cloud of fire like a skateboard. That’s Mitchell’s interpretation of the Spirit of God hovering over the nativity. I wasn’t there so I’m not going to knock it. Part of me is uncomfortable with this but I sense absolutely no sarcasm or sacrilege in his spirit when he tells me about this picture. And the other figure that looks like an angel to the left of the star of David is actually not an angel. I was corrected on that by the artist himself. It’s in fact God the Father looking down on God the Son while God the Spirit is riding on a cloud. Hey, I’m just sayin’ the kid has some pretty dang good theology going on. And I will definitely be buying this box of cards. If you would like to place an order feel free to let me know because one day you just might see this in an art gallery. Ha! I love my boy in all his creativity!!!

Linking with Michelle today

Some awesome stuff….

2011-10-21T09:37:00.001-07:00

Phil Wickham’s new album “Response” is A.mazing. I listened to it like forty times over all the way down to Greenville this week and back. Our kids know half the songs now too. My favorite song is “One God” and it just rocks on so many different levels. I feel like I’m singing out of a theology book as I belt out the words to half these songs. It really is incredible. God knew the timing of this CD would be great for me and my study on the Names of God just compliments it all. Don’t you love how you’ll read something in the Bible and then you hear a song that just drives the point home or visa versa. I love how God uses layers of His word to reach our hearts.

The next great thing I’ve been reading is “What Women Fear”, by Angie Smith. I was sent this book to review only knowing that Angie Smith is the wife of Todd Smith, lead singer for the group Selah. I also knew about her blog Bring the Rain . I had no clue until reading this book how she would share so openly of her struggles with fear from an early age. Her vulnerability is raw and simply incredible. She entwines her story with examples from scripture to encourage the reader in this area of releasing control…..because really most fears root in not being in control. Whether you struggle with intense phobias and fears or not, this is a wonderful book to read. If you’re like me, you probably know someone who is effected by very serious fear. Maybe it comes in the form of panic attacks, inhibitions or control freak-ness. And while we all struggle with some degree of fear, I think this book gives better understanding to the one who is gripped by fear. If you struggle with intense fear please read this book. You will find encouragement here. You’ll be told that there’s no quick, poofy formula to make it go away but that there’s a way to still live effectively and for His glory while walking this road. As you hear one woman’s story of her love for Christ and her tension with fear you will be reminded that we all have a thorn to live with and it’s still possible to bring Him glory while we grapple with life issues on this side of heaven.

I won this book, grace for the Good Girl, a few weeks ago and have been reading it slowly because honestly I feel like a huge dart has landed on the bulls eye of my forehead. Listen to some of the chapters and see if just the titles alone don’t make you say “ouch” in a churchy kind of good girl way. I’m not even half way through yet but I can see how this book is really going to stretch me in some ways. It’s already pointing out some areas of “me” that I just always felt was simply “me” and just “who I am” not necessarily “wrong”. I hate books like this. It’s like Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges. It’s a form of a spiritual butt whoopin in a way. But I love that both of these books are well written and done in a spirit of humility and grace. I don’t feel beat up or bullied by a condescending, unhappy person. Instead it’s someone presenting truth in love. And that makes all the difference in the world. Actually what makes the real difference is the Holy Spirit using whatever He chooses to do a change inside of us. Anyways, about those chapters…here they are:

chasing expectations: hiding behind her good performance
my not-so-extreme makeover: hiding behind her good reputation
with a wink and a smile: hiding behind her fake “fine”
martha and my many things: hiding behind her acts of service
the rule follower: hiding behind her spiritual disciplines
can’t fall apart: hiding behind her strength and responsibility
picket fences: hiding behind her comfort zone
when it gets ugly: hiding behind her indifference
hide-and-seek: game over

So are you reading anything or listening to anything that’s working on your heart these days? Would love to hear about it if you’re willing to share.

Needed to laugh

2011-10-20T07:32:00.001-07:00

Found these xtra large straws at Harris Teeter and Sophie and I both just cracked up when we saw them. She grabbed them off the rack and said, “Look Mom! They’re as long as my leg!” And that just made me laugh out loud. Part of it was the fact that I just needed to laugh because it’s been a long tense week and it didn’t take much for me to unload the big fat lady laugh that sounds like it erupts from the depths of the underground world. We were the suckers who bought them and took them home to try out. And we’ve knocked over a few drinks just in getting used to these things. But they really are fun. You know you want to go get some. They’re only $1.99 which I thought was reasonable. Dare ya to go try them out. End cap of the drink aisle.

The other fun thing we did last night was eat dinner on our cheesy homemade plates that I adore. I could never get Randy to make one and I know he regrets it badly. That was a joke. He could care less. So I’m thinking about making him one that says Grumpy Britches Plate or something like that. Until then he gets to eat off of my plate that I made in the first grade.

I just think it’s pretty funny that I drew myself as an African American. And why is the door of the house a triangle? I’m sure that means something or nother like how smart I am. Pretty sure of that. Oh, and I have turquoise hair with a huge bow with some bling going on in it. Ha! Ha! Love it.

Thought I’d put in a picture of Sophie’s reading time. This is exactly how I used to memorize my Bible verses when I was in Christian school. For real. Something about being upside down that made it sink into the brain hole a little better.

Have a great Thursday my friends! The weekend is right around the corner. Whoo-hoo!

The Ugly Run

2011-10-19T11:47:00.001-07:00

To be honest, the last week has been a heavy one for me on a number of different fronts. If I’ve ever needed to be reminded of who God is in light of difficult circumstances it is now. It’s not so much what I’m going through personally as much as it is people that I love and are dear to me. I told you of a friend who lost her 42 yr old husband last week and another friend of mine is walking through some difficult stuff as well. But I feel as if I’m going through it in a small way myself. I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t appreciate me saying that because I’m not walking their painful steps and don’t really have a clue what they are experiencing but my heart just aches for them. I find myself wanting to “fix” and “make better” and I even go overboard at trying to be supportive at times. Me and my codependent ways allow me to smother at times. I have to step back and trust the One who sees the situations, El Roi- as we are learning in Bible Study, will be the One to see them through these tough times. And He will. I just know He will. But it still hurts like crazy for the time being.

I am amazed at the difference it makes when we walk through tough times with an accurate understanding of who God is. It is foundational and crucial to walking through sucky seasons with hope and joy. I think this understanding of God comes first through knowledge of who He is. And that typically comes through reading the Bible, hearing the Bible taught, etc. But it’s when this knowledge of who God is collides with our life experiences that we gain more of an understanding of who He is and how that effects us personally. The Holy Spirit opens our eyes and guides us to truth as we lay the knowledge of who our God is on top of our current situation. It changes everything. It doesn’t make it easier. The pain is there. The wish for it to be different is most likely there. But the difference comes in taking the next step….the fact that we can look forward to the next step. And it’s how we finish the season of pain. We will be different because of it but I’m convinced we can be better because of it.

I think we can be better as a result of our painful circumstances because we are forced to run to God in a totally different way. It’s more like an awkward, desperate, out of breath, who-cares-what-others-think, kind of a run to Jesus. There is no refinement or concern for doing it right…..you just run to Him and cling to Him because there is nothing else to do. I call it the ugly run and I’ve done it plenty of times. And in the clinging to Him during these times is where our understanding and knowledge of Him grows even more personal and deep. I would venture to say His voice sounds different in these times. Is it really? Maybe. I don’t know really. I just feel that way because I’ve experienced Him in these times and they are different than all others, these times of raw pain. I sense His compassion even in what seems like distance. And it’s when His voice goes stronger or more gentle that I gain that much more of an understanding of who He is. He is real. He is personal. He is the same yesterday, today and forever and yet He deals with me intimately. He knows what makes me respond. He knows how I tick. He is good all the time and so when life has reached rock bottom and it feels like the farthest thing from good, I cling to what I know of my God. Not what I think might be true or how I’m feeling about the situation. But what I know and what I’ve experienced Him to be.

And you know, I wish I’d just do the ugly run to Jesus every day but I don’t. Things settle down after the storm and I straighten my collar and start walking casually in my own strength. I hate that but it’s true. I forget that it’s a raging battle out here and there’s a very real enemy seeking to devour me every single day. Part of our victory in these hard times takes place before the crisis even begins. It’s in our today and if I choose to get to know Him through His word. The other part comes in the actual crisis…..remembering to run to Him. The more we run to Him the more natural it becomes. And maybe our arms don’t flail quite as much or maybe they do. But it doesn’t matter, the form in which we run, it just matters who we run to.

The Name of the Lord is a strong tower, those who run to it will be safe.

I’m praying for my sweet friends to keep running to their strong tower. And I pray we all will gain an understanding of who our God is today, tomorrow and the next day so that when our next crisis comes we will know who we’re running to and that He will provide safety.

Randomness: including highs and lows

2011-10-11T17:15:00.001-07:00

Our weekend was a fabulous one with a visit from a childhood friend and her family. We grew up together. In fact, she’s in this picture:

The floor totally gives away the fact that this picture was taken in the 70’s. Ash and I were neighbors for years and our families were very close. Our favorite story is that her Grandmother, “Gran” lived with them and we would always go and see her and she came to our house as well for dinner and parties and such. She used a cane because she needed the extra assistance but one night as she was at our house for dinner my Mom and Dad had put a fake spider in a chair for one of the kids to sit on and somehow she was the one that got the spider chair and it scared her so bad that she jumped up out of her chair and started walking normal. And did from that day on. It was like Benny Hen showed up in the form of a spider or something. True story. Our family still talks about it.

Anyways, Ashley and her family live in Atlanta and they came up to see us and spent the weekend with us. It was so much fun. Our kids played and had a blast together and we talked, shopped, went to church and had a great time together. Our church family loved them too and that was pretty cool. Ash is the kind of girl everyone loves. She’s can talk to a pole and get feedback. I’m serious, the girl connects with anyone. And that’s why I love her so much. So it was a great encouragement to us for them to hang with us for an entire weekend.

Sophie was enthralled with Julie and wanted to be just like her. Dressed like her, wore her hair like hers, ate the same foods, etc. It was really funny. They both love art so they enjoyed coloring and drawing on the front porch. We even bought coke bottles for the special weekend and the kids thought they were big stuff not only drinking coke but doing it out of a glass bottle. That’s high faluttin’ for us ya’ll. Ha! Mitchell and John William played with airsoft guns, legos and all things boy.

******************************************************************************************************************************

Randy went to Catalyst this past week in Atlanta and is still talking about it. The speaker line up makes me drool: Andy Stanley, Priscilla Shirer, Mark Driscoll, Francis Chan, David Platt, Joel Houston (Hillsong), Judah Smith, Dave Ramsey and more! Yeah, amazing right? Randy and James (our new youth pastor) both said they thought Priscilla rocked the house, or the GA dome in this case. I’m sorry, but I just love that. I love that an African American woman ~~preached~~ spoke at a pastor’s conference and brought the house down. Randy said all the speakers were phenomenal. Francis Chan was really amazing he said. I wanted to be there sooooo bad. Maybe next year. Oh, this was funny. Randy calls me on his cell from the conference and we have this conversation:

Randy: You would’ve loved the live interview we just got to see.

Me: Who was it with?

Randy: Kate, the girl with all the kids

Me: Kate Gosselin?!!?

*interference on phone*

Randy: Yeah, it was really neat. What she’s doing is amazing.

Me: I’m just still trying to figure out why Catalyst brings in Kate Gosselin to speak to thousands of pastors, I just don’t get that.

Randy: NO!!! Not her. Kate….the blog you follow in Uganda

Me: Ohhhhh……that’s KATIE as in Kisses from Katie!!!!!!

Randy: Well, whatever. Her. It was awesome.

Ah-ha-ha-ha!!! (that’s my new laugh by the way. It has changed slightly. It starts with “Ah” instead of “Ha”. And yes, I do actually think it makes a difference. But I might change it back next week because sometimes I get confused on starting out that way.)

**********************************************************************************************************************

Randy and I have a dear friend we went through Youth Group and college with. Her parents were our youth sponsors and were like a rock for our group. CiCi was one of the few kids who went to public school but she was the one of the strongest Christians in our youth group. She used to say that youth group was her “haven” because of some of the junk she faced at school. She married an equally strong man of God and they have two small children. They serve at Lebanon Baptist Church in Roswell, GA as the Youth Pastor and this weekend God called Darrin home in the middle of the night. He had a heart attack. 42 years old. Man of God, serving and loving God. Gone. Leaving a young wife and children. It has rocked my world in the most unusual way. I am compelled to pray for them many times during the day. I can’t help but cry for her and her children at random times in the day. The pain of this kind of loss is unfathomable for me. I have one close friend who has experienced loss on this level and that is heavy enough. I can’t imagine being “the one” and I’m sure they always thought the same too. CiCi has such a strong faith and even now she exhibits amazing courage and strength in the midst of her shock, pain and grief. Please pray for them if you will. We are heading down to the viewing this Thursday and funeral on Friday.

**********************************************************************************************************************

A wonderful piece of news is that Randy’s sister, Leanne had her baby last week. Randy got to see sweet little Addie while he was down for Catalyst and the rest of us will get to see her this weekend. We are really excited about it. The flip sad news to this great news is that they are moving to TX in a few weeks. Another set of great news is that Randy’s other sister and family who lives in Palau (missionaries) is in town and we’ll get to see them this weekend and their three daughters. Our kids are flipping out about this. This is their only cousins their age and they miss them so much. When they get together they do that cousin thing where you just pick up where you last left off like family does. And it’s great fun. We are looking forward to it.

So it’s like we have had a week of highs and lows. I’m left being thankful for the fact that our God never waivers in His love or faithfulness to us. When life seems to yank us to and fro we can know that we have a Rock and an Anchor. He is enough. And I will choose to cling to Him.

“The Name of the Lord is a strong tower, those who run to it will be safe.” Proverbs 18:10

The Faces of Ministry–Part Two

2011-10-07T11:57:00.001-07:00

I think an overlooked face of ministry is allowing others to minister to us. I think this is just as much a vital part of ministry as ministering to others is. In many ways it’s harder to let others reach out to us, encourage us, and offer words of wisdom. It feels much better to be the one who can offer than to receive for some reason. Pride I suppose. But I think something beautiful happens when we don’t resist being ministered to. When we humble ourselves and recognize our need for others. I think we see a another dimension of the Body of Christ when we do this. At first it might take discipline to accept help from others. It might feel awkward. We might have to force ourselves to accept someone’s offer to help. For example, when you know you are overloaded and someone offers to bring you a meal, teach your lesson, watch your child, or whatever it may be…..stop yourself before you say “Oh, that’s okay, thanks anyways. I’ll be alright.” Let them do it for heaven’s sake! Who cares if you are the meal coordinator at your church and have been for 102 years…..someone can still be allowed to deliver you a meal without it being a weird thing.

If we can start with simply saying “yes” to an offer then maybe we can move to the hard task of asking for help from others. How hard this is especially for the driven, type A personality. “Ask for help? Are you crazy, don’t have time and it wouldn’t be done the way I want it anyways. Then it requires more time to fix what just got messed up. Besides, everyone else is busy taking care of their own families. Asking for help just heaps on more stress for everyone.” This thought pattern is so contrary to scripture and how God seems to have set up the church. Bearing one another’s burdens, sharing as if my stuff is your stuff and on and on we see the Body of Christ caring for one another in the Bible. But in order for that to happen sometimes we need to speak up, as hard as it is, and ask for help.

Sometimes I think it’s an issue of not knowing how to reach out to others for help. Not understanding or ever seeing what true community can look like in a church might feed into this. Because if you grew up thinking that you are the only one who is ever going to take care of yourself and you must pull yourself up by your boot straps in order to survive, then the Body of Christ coming together to help one another is a very foreign concept. And so I wonder if a face of ministry is prayerfully anticipating the needs of others. Not that we go around as the ministry police looking to do the mercy pounce on people….whatever that is. But being sensitive to what others might need around us. I have often wondered what it would be like to go through an entire day and to know the events of the last 48 hours of the strangers around us. Like the car in front of you that isn’t going at the green light. Imagine a big flat screen TV in the sky revealing what went down in their household for the last two days. Would we so impatiently honk our horn if we knew the terminal diagnosis they had just received. What if we knew about the abuse the waitress goes home to every single night……would we roll our eyes in disgust when she got the order all wrong. Of course we can’t always know the hurts and pain people around us go through but when we know there is stressful circumstances in their life (loss of job, recent move, death in the family, aging parents, illness) thinking and praying through what might be an encouragement to them is always a great place to start in ministering to others.

The gift of a handwritten note today is something worthwhile. A text message of nothing but scripture can be more powerful than you think. That phone call where you think you don’t know what to say, but pray and ask God for words and you do it anyways, can be just what that person needed. This type of ministry takes opening our eyes to the daily world around us. Not in a superior way….. thinking we know what people need and can meet that need, because only God can do that. But He uses us to encourage His people, His church. And asking Him to give us insight into the needs of people around us and what our place might be in helping people is a powerful ministry. And it has many faces of its own. It will look different every time. You might even think “ministry” is too strong of a word because it seems so small or insignificant. It might seem more like a good gesture that anyone would do. And I think this is where a Christ like approach/purpose is the difference between ministering and a kind gesture. You can take a loaf of bread to your neighbor and it be a nice thing to do or you can take a loaf of bread to your neighbor and it be a ministry moment. How you approach it makes all the difference in the world. For me, making something for a neighbor means I pray while I’m making the item. First of all I pray it turns out and doesn’t burn to shreds in my oven. And yes, that is necessary these days for some reason. Secondly I pray for the person personally. I take what little I know of the person and ask God to intervene and meet the needs He already knows. I ask for Him to use the small token loaf of bread to somehow show His love. And then we walk it over and spend a few minutes with that person. No big deal. I don’t preach my husband’s last sermon or anything. Just walk over some goodies and spend some time talking. This is ministry. It seems shallow, light, unimportant. But it’s not. It’s powerful when preceded with prayer and for the purpose of loving others. Sometimes it takes the bringing over of bread for a year before they cry on your shoulder and ask for prayer for the cancer diagnosis they just received. Ministering in small ways many times opens the doors for direct divine dialog in days to come. But you’d never get there if it weren’t for the handfuls of purpose, as my Father-in-law calls them, along the way. I shouldn’t say “never” because God can use anything He wants and does use random, out of the blue moments to share Christ’s love. But in my experience, He has used the slow process of relationship to get to that point more than a random come to Jesus talk.

Well, these are just some of my thoughts on ministry. It was long and I haven’t even touched on ministry from the perspective of a pastor’s family. But I think this is where my heart is right now because I see people underestimate the power of ministry. And if we could get a hold of the concept that, as believers, we are all ministers of the Gospel and it doesn’t mean you necessarily are the preacher then our communities would be forever changed. Our churches would be changed as we care for each other and let others care for us in the way God designed it.

I don’t always practice this well. I will always remember cringing at the fact that people in my church were washing our clothes while I had surgery. I’ll be honest and say I didn’t allow the underwear out of the house. The deal was Randy or I would put the laundry basket out on the front porch and someone in our church would come by and pick it up and then deliver it the next day all folded. I know…..a total God send of a ministry! My house was cleaned for me and meals delivered. Amazing. Felt really weird and uncomfortable but it was something I will never ever forget in my life. That and my friend in church calling me up when I was freaking out about my surgery not going the way it was supposed to and I was having complications. Long story. I’ll just say we were praying the “poopy prayer” together. Not many people you can do that with. Ha! I can’t believe I just said that. I wasn’t “going” like I was supposed to and I was afraid I had another blockage and was gripped with fear. My friend called me up and said, “I’m coming over and taking you to get coffee.” I said, “No, I’m in my pj’s.” And she said, “Then I’ll get in mine too and we’ll go in our pj’s.” And she did, ya’ll. She put on her pj’s and we went and got coffee. Never did she quote a Bible verse to me and I don’t recall even talking a ton. But there we were. Together. At Holy Grounds coffee shop in our pajama’s. And it was ministry if I’ve ever seen it.

See, told ya ministry can be weird sometimes. Ha!

The Faces of Ministry–Part One

2011-10-05T11:58:00.001-07:00

The faces of ministry is ever changing and I love how creative the Body of Christ becomes when we prayerfully ask God how we can serve Him and others. Because it’s not always inside the steeple clad building that we see ministry taking place. And of course it’s not just through clergy and trained professionals that ministry takes place either. That would be scary if it was. I use the word “ministry” because it’s quick and easy to reference. What I mean is simply loving and serving God while loving and serving others. Wikipedia puts it this way: activity by Christians to spread or express their faith.

I think sometimes we discredit the power of something small and even enjoyable. Like for some reason we feel real ministry can’t ever be fun or alternative to something churchy feeling. But the reality is that most of our ministry opportunities take place outside the church because we’re in our work places and homes more than we’re in church just by the nature of real living. Where we are is where our ministry is. How we view our coworkers, interact with our neighbors, train our children and love those around us is our ministry. For the stay at home Mom it might look like taking a meal to someone or visiting with a neighbor while your child explores your neighbor’s house. I know, how embarrassing right? That’s what Sophie did every time we’d go visit someone early on. We’ve had to ~~threaten her~~ train her not to go looking into bedrooms and closets. But she still does it occasionally. Ministry is messy and just because you do it doesn’t mean you always do it right or that it looks nice and clean. And that’s okay. Sometimes it’s awesome fun and involves something as silly as spending time with a group of kids at a carnival and other times it just flat out stinks and involves watching someone go through extreme pain causing your own emotional strength to be sucked out of you. But you are there for that person. Praying, crying and listening. Ministry is relationship. It takes time. Effort. Awkwardness. Messiness. Sacrifice. Vulnerability.

Ministry is intentional living. It could be as simple as praying before entering the grocery store and asking God to open your eyes to the one who might need help around you. And for me, one time, it was as personal and awkward as sharing a letter to a stranger. And as formal as sharing the same thing to a large group event that had my panties in a big ole wad.

Ministry is reaching out to people on their turf even if you have no interest in their turf. It might mean attending an event with someone that is important to them but that you have no interest in. Time is always of essence for the average person and so praying over which opportunities to engage in is important. True ministry is Spirit led and fueled by prayer, not just a compassionate heart doing what a compassionate person does. And if we’re honest, we’ll admit that sometimes we don’t like the specific task God calls us to through ministry. Because sometimes God calls us to things we’d never dream of doing for various reasons: too scared, too costly, too risky, too weird……and we start that whole “did I hear you right, God? Lord, send a hot pink sparkly good year blimp in the air at 3:04pm today if that’s really what you want me to do because I will so be your girl if you send that sign today. For real. I will. Oh, and lets add a lightening bolt behind the blimp for good measure so I don’t have to really do this. I mean, just to show your power.”

Ministry will not always be what we expect it to look like. In fact, I can say it has rarely ever looked like I thought it would. And I think this has to do with the Spirit led stuff. Because when it’s our ideas fueled by our thinking and our agenda it gets all screwed up. But when we acknowledge God as the Master minister and ask Him for guidance it makes all the difference.

I have found that God has called me to a few ongoing ministries and then others just pop up out of the blue, totally unplanned but Spirit driven. My prayer is that I will remember the importance of relying on Him to direct ministry in my life, even when He tells me to pull back. Oh yes, I do believe that sometimes He stops ministry. And I want to be ever sensitive to HIs leading in my life in these areas.

Ministry is very personal and I wonder what you might add to what ministry looks like for you.

The tombstone that put me in a body cast

2011-10-03T19:25:00.001-07:00

Nothing like dragging your own personal mattress around with you to birthday parties. Ha! Don’t I look pathetic just looking on the birthday fun with my mattress and birthday hat? I mean what a killjoy.

That’s me when I broke my leg and ended up in a body cast. It started out as just a regular cast on the one leg but the bone grew back the wrong way and they had to re-break my leg and then put me in a body cast from my armpits down. Both legs were in a cast. My friend posted this picture on Facebook the other week and it was a total blast from the past.

I do remember very well that day I broke my leg. I was five years old and was goofing around the cemetery our family was visiting. We were looking for my Granddad's Great Granddad or something like that….a relative’s tombstone. The cross beams that were in front of the tombstones were intriguing to me and I just had to jump them. I lost my balance and grabbed the tombstone in front of me and it came out of the ground and fell on my leg breaking my left femur. Dad struggled to lift the tombstone off me and Mom said he had a surge of supernatural strength and was able to do it. I don’t know about that but I imagine it was pretty dang heavy considering it just snapped my leg in two. I was sort of hoping for a break in the leg because I had just been told to not walk on the crossbeams. And I wasn’t, technically. I was running on them. And I knew I was gonna be in hot water if I wasn’t hurt bad. Ha! Not really. But I do remember saying “I’m sorry. I’m sorry” and being told it was okay and not to worry about it. We were in the middle of nowhere in TN and of course there were no cell phones back then so my Dad did what any Eagle scout would do….. he tore down the white picket fence surrounding the graveyard and made a splint for my leg. They loaded me in the back of the car and drove what seemed like an eternity to a hospital. I will never ever forget crossing the railroad tracks. I think my leg hurts now just thinking about it. Ugh! We made it to the hospital and my Granddad almost passed out in the hallway. It was a fiasco from what I understand. Mom said she was in pure shock and denial and was talking about how she could decorate my room for me when I got out of the hospital….all while I’m like having major leg spasms and about to pass out myself. Not funny but I have to laugh because it’s so my family. And I love my family and they love me. And I’ll just keep reminiscing and providing my own therapy to save on money. I do this about once every six months so pardon the “family album” post. So we finally made it through the hospital stay and I was released. Little did we know that during those six weeks I would be coming back for an xray that revealed the bone had grown crooked. Have I ever told you that I fall into that “3%” category of things going wrong. Yeah, I’m that girl sometimes. So then I had to go back and get a new and improved BODY cast. Yeah, imagine sharing that news with your ADHD five year old. Ha!!! I don’t remember that conversation at all. That’s probably when I went into shock for the first time.

My Mom said I pretty much stayed mad and angry during those six months I was in the full body cast. I was a very active child (hence the broken leg) running and jumping everywhere and so being confined to the body cast and looking on while everyone played outside was pretty hard on me. (I think that’s why when I got saved four years later there was such a noticeable difference in me. My attitude and spirit completely changed.) I remember my parents toting me around in that body cast everywhere they went. Mom had to make special clothes for me and yes, there was a hole in the cast so I could go to the bathroom. Awk*ward. But you know you were wondering. The best part of the deal was that I got these xtra long Q-tips…..like four feet long…..to scratch my back with because the stuff in the cast was like that pink stuff in attics that you’re not supposed to step on. What’s that stuff called? I can’t remember. It wasn’t really the same stuff but it was real itchy so they gave me those long Q-tips which I alternately used for sword fighting. And I thought that was way cool. The other cool thing was all the presents I got. And my room got all redid-upped. See, Mom really was doing mental decorating while I was in the ER! So while being confined was a bummer the perks were pretty awesome too.

Here’s what is really wild about this story…..the tombstone that fell on my leg…..was the relative’s tombstone my family was looking for. Yes huh. My Mamma said so! The other freaky thing is that my Dad told me that there was a child who was killed in that same graveyard earlier that year from the same thing happening. Evidently it was a real old cemetery and the tombstones weren’t very stable. I know….it sounds like too uncanny to believe. A bit sensational. But they tell me that’s the way it happened. All we needed was for someone to have looked at me before all the drama and said, “Go break a leg, Mel!”

But that’s not the case.

So that’s pretty much my sob story. My friend says everyone’s entitled to one poor baby a year or something like that. So I’m still claiming this one from 35 years ago. Oh my word…..did I just do regressive therapy on myself and succeed? I don’t even know what that is. Have I had graveyard issues all these years and didn’t even know it til now? Is that why I hold my breath every time I go by a cemetery? No, that’s just a game we always played. I don’t know what happened here but I find it pretty entertaining even if nobody ever reads this. I have had fun tonight remembering the drama and quirky days of the body cast. OMGosh, I just had a thought. I wonder if my brother pushed me in front of the tombstone and my sister pulled it over on me and I’ve been burying it all these years and that’s really why my brother and sister wore black to my 40th birthday party last month. Haaa!!!!! I’m kidding. It is definitely time for me to go to bed.

P. S. I will ~~laugh~~ cry so hard if any of my reader’s break a leg this week. Please email me if you do, because I will feel inclined to pay for your hospital bill. Or for your shrink 35 years later.

Sophie and Hair Issues

2011-09-30T18:55:00.001-07:00

Sophie was so offended when I laughed at her hair. Her comment was, "It's not funny. It's beautiful. I'm going to my wedding!"

When I asked who she was about to marry she replied, "I can't remember his name." And she got even madder when I snickered.

She is so stinkin’ serious about her hair. And I’m not good at doing girl hair. And she knows it. She wants exotic braids and froo froo hair and I just don’t know how to do all that. We’re doing good to have a basic pony tail that stays in all day long. And she won’t wear bows except on Sundays. I told her I reserve the right to make her wear a bow one day a week and I choose Sunday. I hate to make her wear one when she hates it so much. I wish I was like some of these smart Moms who slap a headband bow on their baby as soon as it comes out of the womb so that when they are all grown up and have gray hair they are still wearing bows because they were conditioned to wear them early on. Pavlov bow babies.

To top off my already can’t-do-hair complex, Sophie comes to me this week and tells me I can just send her with a rubber band to school so that her teacher could do her hair. Arg! Utter betrayal. I fell out of my chair and then got up with more determination to learn how to do girl hair than ever before. For real. She went to school that morning with slightly lopsided Princess Leia braided buns. And she strutted to school she was so proud of them. And I did a little struttin myself with my side pony tail that looked like a 40 year old trying to look 30. Oh well, I was on a hair high.

I didn’t think I had to do worry about Mitchell’s hair until he walked out the door with that thing on his head last week. Randy wouldn’t let him wear it to school. Aren’t we thankful for Randy in my life and in our children’s lives? I am. Because we would be so messed up without him.

Hope everyone has a great hair day and a fabulous fall weekend!

Waiting for the perfect…..

2011-09-29T18:55:00.001-07:00

I tend to be “ideal girl”. Always waiting for the best and most ideal time to do things. If I can’t do it at the prime time then I don’t do it at all and so that’s why many days I would miss my time in the Word. My plans were to spend time in the Bible during Sophie’s nap but then I would end up doing house work and so when she woke up there was no way I could do my quiet time. Four year old and quiet. Yeah, that just doesn’t work out. Or so I thought. Until one day I decided to incorporate Sophie into my world of devotions. I sat her on the couch with me and pulled out my book and Bible and told her we were going to do Bible Study together. I wanted to laugh out loud at how ridiculous that sounded but held back my holy laughter. I read aloud from Jesus Calling by Sarah Young and Sophie was just shaking her head through the whole thing. Agreeing with every word spoken. Then I read from my Bible and we prayed. It was different than what I had planned but it was really neat. The next few days we did this until Sophie wanted to lead our time of Bible Study and she did. She read from Mitchell’s Star Wars DSi game booklet. It ~~magically~~ divinely turned into a prayer book and so she read prayers aloud to me. Too bad they weren’t to God since that’s what prayer is all about. Oh well, you take what you can get from a four year old. I let her lead our time together for a while and then I told her I needed some time alone with God and she could have her time alone with Him too. And that lasted for about four minutes and then I heard some cartoons blaring upstairs. But that was okay because she’s four and four year olds watch cartoons…..but they can also participate in a time of worship with Mom. And I never knew that until then.

I had forgotten about some of this until today as our youth pastor’s wife and I were talking about our time in the Word and how it can be such a struggle at times especially with little ones at home 24/7 and with no family around to help out with childcare. Priscilla Shirer encouraged me a few years ago in a women’s event I attended to take small bites of the Word and meditate all week on them. She’d take three or so verses and write them on note cards and read them daily and meditate on them….asking God to change her as a result of practicing the Word and fleshing it out. Just small bites and short amounts of time based on the season of your life. At the time she was speaking from the season of having three preschool aged boys and so her meditation and reading of verses took place while she was washing dishes, folding laundry and driving to the grocery store. Intentional but maybe not exactly what we think of as divine encounters with God.

But what is a divine encounter with God anyways? Isn’t it when God initiates relationship with us and we respond? Even if it’s in the carpool line or in the laundry room mulling the Word around in our hearts. Or with a toddler sitting in your lap. It’s God speaking and us listening and the other way around too because it’s a relationship. Not that we are equals because we aren’t but He listens to us and He speaks to us out of His grace and love for us.

Man I’m glad He takes us wherever we are, aren’t you?

What are your thoughts about multitasking and meditation? Do you feel this is not making time with God a priority or do you view it as making time with God a priority by being creatively intentional in how you spend your time?

If I could I SO would!

2011-09-26T19:54:00.001-07:00

If I could wear these shoes I totally would…….

except that I’d end up in a body cast, again. Arg! Yeah, really I was, but that’s a story for another day.

I would so wear this cuteness hat if it weren’t for the fact that hats and my head are like breeding cats and dogs: you just.don’t.do.it. Even my favorite shop owner will agree with me on this. I love hats so much and I always try one on when I go to her store just in case my head/hat dynamic has changed but it hasn’t. We both just laugh at how wrong it is. Okay, next option….

Love this coat and hat combo but I would be on the Richter scale in hot flashes by the time I closed the last button. It’s a no go.

I have no legitimate reason for not wearing my hair like that or snatching up some similar spectacles other than I’d become one. But is that really a reason not to? Exactly. Okay, that’s not very mature of me.

Maybe I’ll settle for something more refined like this….

It looks very parish-ish and I probably could use some help in that department, however, I feel the sweat beading on my lip just looking at all those layers. There’s no way.

Ooooh, and what about this interesting outfit…..this chick scares me to death. Reminds me of what my college roommate taught me my Freshman year: “Heeyyyy, don’t look at me that way or I’ll rip your eyeballs out and look at you with’emmm” I’m pretty sure the lady in red might be thinking similar thoughts. And if I was wearing that I might be thinking the same thing.

Enough with the shoulda- coulda- woulda’s ….I’m perfectly happy with my wardrobe!

Happy Fall shopping my friends! May you find something that doesn’t make you look like a sweaty, refined parishioner with hat head.

I didn’t plan it or bring anything!

2011-09-24T18:49:00.001-07:00

How refreshing……..

to attend a women’s conference I didn’t plan. To soak up the Word from a precious woman of God who spoke so openly and with such gracious transparency. For my name to be called as a door prize winner and to do the “I won a door prize and I never win door prizes dance” with your friend who also won a door prize. How incredibly awesome to see one of my mentors in action and to marvel at how God brought us together in such a random but specifically divine way. Pretty cool to spend two hours in the car talking and listening to my new ministry partner at church. Soaking up the view of the VA mountains was pretty amazing too. And I go to bed early tonight being thankful for the 24 hour refreshment that was given at just the right time. Honestly, I think I could’ve listened to that Nun who recites monotone chants on TV, won a tacky door prize and got eaten alive by bedbugs and still be glad for the time. Ha! Okay, not really but it did just feel wonderful to not lead, announce, teach or organize anything and to simply be there.

Be mindful that He knows what we need and when we need it.

A shot in the arm

2011-09-22T07:47:00.001-07:00

All she did was look at the brownie I brought to my man from the church dessert table and say, “I’m glad to see you do that for him.” We both knew she was referring to the 50’s bride thing. She’s still one and I long to be better in this area of ~~pampering~~ taking care of my husband. We both went our separate ways and I later thought how much that meant to me. That she would encourage me like that. A quick, simple phrase whispered in my ear in passing and yet it did something in my heart. It lingered in my ears so much so that I did the same thing the second night. It reminded me of how mentoring and training a younger woman doesn’t have to be difficult. Sometimes it just means pointing out the good and saying, “Nice job, keep it up!” Other times it means pointing out what has been overlooked. A new mentor and I were having lunch and after listening to me for a while she says to me, “You need to stop and celebrate what has happened!” She was so right. I was buzzing past something good and scrambling to make it better only to realize I never paused long enough to recognize and give thanks for the things God had already done. Celebrate. It’s a word that has been rattling around in my head ever since. I’ve thought a lot about that conversation and my tendency to just conquer without stopping to savor and enjoy. And I’ve done more celebrating the last few weeks as a result of it. I’m growing in areas because of a few conversations from older women who took the time to point out the positive and the negative in me.

Mentoring: it’s spending time with another person; it’s on purpose conversations and it’s speaking truth into one’s life for the purpose of growth and maturity. It’s not always as easy as saying “good job” but these are simple steps that get us started. The time spent and the affirmation offered, often times, needs to happen before speaking hard-to-hear truth can happen. So I’m not exactly ironing pillow cases and clipping my husband’s toe nails just yet but I am growing in this area of serving him and partly it’s because I have a few cheerleaders who are encouraging me along. Whoo-hoo for mentors!!! You know who you are and I thank you for your investment in me.

I’m wondering if you have a mentor or are mentoring someone and if so, what has been the greatest value in that relationship?

Pretty sure I failed that test

2011-09-19T20:14:00.001-07:00

The question Sunday morning was posed, “If God answered all your prayers this past week, how many people’s eternity would be changed as the result?” There were other questions but this one lingered in my mind and heart. For a second I was real proud of myself because I could answer that question with a “one” but only because I lucked out sort of. I so badly want to see my hair stylist come to know Jesus and I pray every time I have a hair appointment with him. And I just so happened to have a hair appointment that week so I scored on this question. A whopping one. Of course life is not a quiz or a game. It’s much more serious. It’s a fight, an intense spiritual battle. And in the arena of the Christian life you die and still live. There’s hope in the pain. But not so for the world follower. You die a world lover and follower and you suffer eternal consequences. Ones we wouldn’t wish on our worst enemy. So why in the world, if by God’s grace I know the answer for eternal hope, would I not be telling more people or at least be praying for their salvation on a more regular basis? I don’t know the answer completely. But I do know that I’m doing a lot of thinking about my lazy evangelistic attitude. I’m good at starting up relationships and being creative in meeting people and getting things started but then I can shoot the breeze to death in a relationship. Where we don’t ever get to the Jesus part of the conversation. I’m extremely focused on the “building” of the relationship which takes time and strategy but the urgency to speak truth doesn’t seem to weigh heavy enough to pray more or to share more. And I don’t mean meeting someone for the first time and throwing up Bible verses all over them and yelling “SINNER” at them. That’s rude. Christians can be rude, all in the name of evangelism and that’s not what I’m talking about here. But I do see where my heart is being awakened in this area of boldness and a sense of urgency over people’s eternal lives.

Can you tell I’ve been to Missions Conference this week at church? Ha! I have. But this is good. Good for me to be challenged in this area that I tend to think I’m doing okay in but am actually seeing I’m not so much. And so I leave our service totally encouraged, challenged and desiring to lead others into the presence of Jesus.

I’m reminded of my new favorite quote: “I’m just one beggar telling another beggar where to get bread.”

What about you? When’s the last time you shared the Bread? And what did that look like for you?

I ask this for us to be able to see the diversity and creativity in sharing Jesus….not in a merit type way but in a community of believers spurring one another along, kind of way. There’s a difference in sharing this stuff for the sake of gratifying oneself and for the edification of the Body of Christ. We’re going for latter.

Linking with Jen and Michelle today.

My take on it

2011-09-15T07:52:00.001-07:00

Getting a tattoo has opened up a lot of conversations and dialogue in the past week. People have emailed, texted and called me wanting to talk about it and it’s been sort of neat to be able to talk about God in this way and to hear other people’s stories too…..to share parts of my faith in random, choppy ways. As time goes on my prayer is that God will use this mark to engage in divine conversations. It was so wild because when Randy and I were having lunch at the Mellow Mushroom trying to kill time before my tattoo appointment we had the slip of paper that had “Elohim” written in Hebrew in four different font sizes. We were still talking through which one to use. I had picked out the smallest one but the tattoo dudes were saying it was too small. So our waiter comes up to us and points to the paper and says, “What does that mean?” I told him and he said, “My friend has that written on his arm but I’ve never asked what it was.” I wish I had thought to say, “Well, you ought to ask him about it and what it means to him.” Because I bet that dude would be so excited to share His God with a friend who might not know Him personally. And what if I got more bold myself and could share a quick short answer to what Elohim means to me in two minutes or less! And I haven’t even told you about the part my gay hairdresser plays in all this. That’s for another day. It’s cool to see God work through something as crazy weird as a tattoo.

I don’t want to say what Randy already so eloquently posted, but I do need to say for myself that the whole tattoo thing for me was personal and something with deeper meaning than just a stamp. Acknowledging God as Creator in a permanent way reminds me that God is all powerful and I wouldn’t exist without Him. And I am nothing without Him. In fact I can’t help but think of God my Creator having a plan to spare my unborn life and our son’s life when abortion was a very real plan and consideration in the making for both of us. Knowing that His name is on my neck where others can see but I can’t reminds me that I wear Jesus every day……and it leaves me wondering what people see. Of course I don’t have to have a tattoo to remind myself of these things. And having a tattoo doesn’t make me the slightest bit spiritual but it also doesn’t mean I’m rebellious or whacked out. Even though I have been rebellious in my heart before and have done some whacky things. For me, it’s a symbol and a reminder. And I do love how symbols and reminders are used all through scripture as a learning tool for God’s people.

Saying all that I still have to acknowledge the fact that as a pastor’s wife getting a tattoo is a little out of the box. Okay, maybe more like a box in another room. I don’t know. It all depends on where you’re coming from with it. I’m pretty sure my Mom is picturing the box in another country and she’s desperately hoping I’ll catch a flight and climb back in.

So how exactly does one tell her very refined, southern Christian mother that she got a tattoo? This was my dilemma. Some of you are thinking, “You just don’t get one, that’s how!” But if it’s too late and you already have one then breaking the news is inevitable unless it’s like on your fanny or something. Heyyyyyy, why didn’t I think of that?! I’m Kidding. I knew I could just wear my hair up and casually stand in front of my Mom for her to notice the tattoo and pretend it was just like a new piece of jewelry or something or I could show it to her straight. I decided to just show her and tell her.

This is how the confession went down with “Ms. Sue” as most of my friends call my sweet Mamma.

Remember I had the tattoo for all of one day and was having to wash it four times a day with antibacterial soap and put ointment on it so it could heal properly. And I was fanatical about it because I tend to fall into that small percentage disclaimer they always throw out with stuff…… “3% of people get an infection after their tattoo and their skin withers up and falls off.” I was doing things by the book.

So the following conversation took place in the bathroom (as if I was in middle school):

Me: Mom, if I show you something do you promise not to be mad at me?

Mom: What is it? Did you break something of Gran’s. No, I won’t be mad. Show me.

Me: pulled up my hair and showed her my “Elohim” tattoo written in Hebrew

Mom: gasps for air and licks her finger with all the gusto you can imagine and tries to wipe it off thinking it’s a joke.

Me: MOM!!!! You can’t do that! You can’t touch it. Now I’m going to die of a gangrene infection! I can’t believe you did that.

Mom: That thing is not real!

Me: It is real, Mom.

Mom: What does it say?

Me: Um. I love you Mom, in Greek?

No, I didn’t say that but I told her the meaning and she shook her head and said, “You have always wanted a tattoo.”

I’m not kidding anyone…I knew there would be, will be people who don’t like the idea of a tattoo for different reasons. And that’s okay. I respect that and don’t feel the need to always have to explain myself or defend myself. Mom joked around with me about it later on and she thanked me for showing her in private and for telling her first (well, after Randy and one other friend whose opinion I really wanted to get before having it done.) and I can only hope she’s not just completely mor.ti.fied. I’m thinking I’ll be wearing my hair down when she’s sitting next to me at church. And singing real loud to make up for the heathen that was birthed inside me.

Without trying to belabor the topic, I thought I’d share with you some repeated questions I’ve been asked this week.

Will you wear your hair down all the time to cover it up? No, I won’t hide it but I won’t be doing updo’s all the time to flaunt it either. My hair is super long right now and it’s driving me crazy so I am prone to wear it in a clip more and have found myself wanting to pull that clip out as I approach someone older than me at church. I do think we make judgments about tattooed people at face value and so I fall into that fear of what others will think of me at times. Randy says “own it” but don’t flaunt it. Trying to remember that.

Do Mitchell and Sophie know? Yes, we showed them and told them what it was and what it meant to me. I said it was a serious decision and that you don’t do things like that until you’re a grown adult.

Did it hurt and how long did it take? Yes, it hurt. I’d say a 6 on a 1-10 scale. The anticipating what it was going to feel like was worse. All I could think about was “sewing machine” and “surgery” with no anesthesia. But of course that was dramatic and it wasn’t anything like that. It took about 15-20 minutes.

Why did you choose behind the neck? It was my first instinct to put it there because I can conceal it if I want to. I also love the fact that I will never see it the way others do.

You know what they say about tattoos…….. “They’re addictive. Like eating chips.” I seriously don’t see myself with another tattoo. But who knows, maybe I’ll go for the wings across my shoulder blades next time.

I love my tattoo. It feels awesome to have done something on my “bucket list” that I never ever thought I’d actually do. And even more than that I love what it means to me.

Well, I’m off to put on my biker leathers and spikes. I’ll catch you at the next truck stop! (sorry Mom)

How do you follow that?

2011-09-14T05:18:00.001-07:00

Well, folks, I know I’m partial, biased and star struck but I still have to say I was so impressed with my man’s post. In fact, I just wanted to relish in it all week long and never post again due to inferiority issues. No, I’m kidding, but I do think it’s pretty cool that he generated that much discussion and it was his first and possibly only (or until I’m 41) blog post. He’s a great speaker also you guys. And it’s not just because I’m his wife ‘just sayin’ but he is for real a great communicator and he’s a kickin’ awesome writer as well. I was so touched by the things he said and the fact that he would even write for me because I know he loathes it. And that’s the truly the kind of person he is, on blog and off blog. I am one blessed 40 year old!

So about turning 40 ……let me hit the highlights real quick….

Randy surprised me with this beautiful Sapphire ring for my birthday. He did so good….picked it out all by himself and pulled off the surprise. We had dinner at PF Changs for the first time and it was delicious. I loved the little white rice sticks that made me think I was eating tall skinny popcorn. And my honey chicken was divine too. Our time at Caribou Coffee was fun and quite an experience as well. Love my man.

My family came up from Atlanta and mourned my turning 40. They were so sad. My Mother cracks me up in this picture. They had to keep telling the kids to stop smiling in all the pictures.

I was so glad my family came up to visit with us on my birthday. It was a special time together since it was the first time for my brother and sister-in-law to come and for us all to be together in church was a really neat thing.

Overall turning 40 was awesome. My family and friends made it so special and fun and I’d do it again if I could.

A few emails/texts have come through asking about my tattoo and wanting to know specifically how my Mother responded and my take on the whole thing. Weeeellllll, lets just say her response was…..well….it was interesting, funny and typical my Mom. Will catch ya up to speed soon but I’m off to Harris Teeter with the coupon queen (our Youth Pastor’s wife, Rachel). I got invited to go with her to Harris Teeter for triples this morning! Yes!!!! I have to behave or she might not take me again. Last time she helped me save a TON of money and I still have ten jars of grape jelly sitting in my pantry. That was a joke.

Thanks for all the bday wishes and for supporting my man’s first ever blog post!

The Mark of My Wife on Her 40th Birthday

2011-09-11T19:41:00.001-07:00

Ok, so here it is. This is not Melody. I am not sassy. I’m not a pastor’s wife. I’m told I tend to ramble, but what do you expect from a pastor.

I’m her husband and I’m writing my first ever “guest blog” entry for my wife.

Today is my wife’s 40th birthday so I have commandeered Melody’s blog to tell you about my amazing wife and our…interesting weekend. If you know Melody, or have gotten to know her through her blog, you already know how precious, fun, lively, unpredictable, profound, “God-besoughted” (sorry for the preachery, Puritan word…but that is my wife – she goes hard after God and I love her for that, and for so much more) my wife is.

Turning 40 is a deal. It can be a big deal…or it can be a “just another deal”…or it can be a “my life is over, I have more years behind me than I have in front of me, WHY IS LIFE SO CRUEL AND I’M SO OLD!!” deal. Melody is not that bad, but she has gotten reflective – contemplative even (have I mentioned I love her!)

So, three days ago, Melody calls me on my cell phone and says “I know what I want to get for my birthday.” Now, any husband knows how good those words sound coming from his wife! That just takes the angst of having to find the perfect, thoughtful, unique gift that she doesn’t already have, that says “I love you”, that is the right size, the right color and is timeless and modern all at the same time!!! She tells me it is something she has been thinking about for a long time and that she wants to tell me to my face because she really wants me to seriously think about it. Ok, now I’m getting a little bit nervous. Does she want a dog (yeah!), a new baby (uh, not with this husband!), a new husband (ok, I’ll get a new baby as long as you let me stay!)?

No, she tells me she wants a tattoo.

As strange as this sounds, this is not a big shock. I know my wife. I know she has thought about this for a long time. Understand, my wife is not a “biker chick”. She is sassy and likes tea cups and scones – she is not likely to get into a bar fight any time soon. But she has always thought it would be neat to have a permanent mark on her that means something. She has been moved by the idea of a tattoo but has been scared of the needle. But now, in her mid-life marking, contemplative, reflective, taking stock of life mood, she decided that this was the time. She said “what do you think? If you’re not for it, I won’t do it and I’ll be fine.” and she means it (did I tell you love her?). I told her “Let’s go!” She said “Seriously? Wait……I’m scared, I don’t know if I can do this!!!” This was also not a big shock. I know my wife. I knew I was going to have to talk her into doing her own idea – and I’m ok with that, because I know her heart and this is something I know she wants, and I want it for her.

I asked her what she wanted and she knew. “I want the name of God, Elohim, and I think I want it in Hebrew.” So we sat down together on Thursday night and looked at designs and thought of how big it should be. We had some really interesting conversations about is it wrong for Christians to get a tattoo because Leviticus 19:28 says “Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the Lord.” Doesn’t that mean tattoos are wrong? But the same chapter says to “not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard.” (vs 27) to “not plant your field with two kinds of seed.” (vs 19) nor to “wear clothing woven of two kinds of material.” (vs 19). So unless you you have sideburns the length of your elbow, are passionately against planting corn and peas in the same garden and have never ever (!) worn a cotton/poly blend then the argument is misguided and misunderstood. We also talked about the thought of is this “taking the name of the Lord in vain?” Is putting the name Elohim on your body disrespectful? I don’t believe it has to be – it could be, but it doesn’t have to be. The name of God is sacred and not to be taken lightly. Casually throwing around the name of God is wrong, but that is not what she’s doing. This is a sacred reminder…an act of worship for her. My thought was: would you have a problem with someone writing a book and titling it Elohim: My Creator God? We came to the conclusion that putting the name of God in the title of a book or a blog was not wrong, so the respectful use of the name of God can be appropriate and healthy.

So I asked her, “where are you going to put this?” She said, “I’m not looking to make it really all that visible. This is something personal for me. I think I want it on the back of my neck.” She said “I just want to have a reminder of the presence of God with me all the time. It’s not something that people will necessarily always see, but I will know it is always there. I like the idea of having a visible mark of ownership of God on me.” This is not the “pensive turning 40” thing talking. That is just the depth of my wife (did I tell you I love her?).

I love the idea of this mark. The meaning of it is really profound to me. The thought that Melody will never actually see this tattoo with her own eyes because it is on the back of her neck is really interesting to me. She will only be able to see it through the lens of something else. Other people can see directly, but she can’t. The only way she can see it is to look in a mirror (actually, use a mirror to look into another mirror to see it). She can see pictures of it. She can see video of it. She can hear other people describe it. But she will never see it with her own eyes. The mark of God is on her literally and spiritually. She doesn’t always see it but it is there. Others see it in her even when she doesn’t see it. It seems to me to be a reminder that while she does not see God directly, she can always see Him through the lens of other things. She can see Him through the lens of Scripture or the lens of circumstances or the lens of the witness of what others see. If I keep pushing the thought, I love the reminder the picture provides that God is always with her where ever she goes. That He is “behind” her as she goes through her life. It calls to my mind the “pleroma” of the Holy Spirit that Paul talks about in Ephesians 5:18 when he calls us to be “filled with the Holy Spirit”. The idea of “pleroma” is the picture of wind filling the sails on a ship. The unseen wind fills and drives the vessel forward. The name of God is literally on her back and pictures to me the driving force of the Holy Spirit for her in her life.

So off we went to Little John’s Tattoo. Chris did a great job and I really think the anticipation of the pain hurt worse than the actual procedure. “Did it hurt?” The look Melody shot me was all I needed to know. It hurt, but she made it.

So here I am, with my wonderful, beautiful wife who is simmering into the age of her 40’s. Not everyone will or should get tattooed. And yes, she thought it would be “sooooooo romantic for both of us to get tattoos together!!!!!!!!!!!” And no, I’m not that romantic. It’s not for me, but is for her – and I would go far enough to say that this is an act of worship for my wife that is in response to God’s pleasure. How cool is it to have a wife who will love and listen to God like that?

You never know what my wife is going to do next. She is unpredictable and crazy. Thoughtful and compassionate. Devoted to God and passionately pursues Him. She loves my kids and leads them to Christ everyday. She is patient with me and supportive of God’s work in my life and makes me way better of a man than I rightfully should be. What can I say – she loves me…and there is no greater treasure God could give me other than Himself.

Can you believe my wife has a tattoo?

Linking with Jen today and her snazzy new vlog! And Michelle too cuz I love her blog as well.

When the mundane turns divine

2011-09-06T19:44:00.001-07:00

When you’re entrenched in churchy activities where you’re constantly surrounded by other Christians it means we need to be that much more prayerfully aware of our surroundings in the world through the little things. Our trips to the bank, the grocery store, the office at work, fill in the ___________. It means the mundane becomes the divine and sometimes when we least expect it and in ways we never would’ve dreamed. I had an experience like this week before last. I sent this excerpt in an email to some busy Mom’s in our church. We get together once a month and I felt compelled to share this story with them of what God impressed on my heart to do.

“I had some left over chicken salad sandwiches and was looking out the kitchen window as I prepared lunch for me and Randy. I happened to notice an older black gentleman sitting on the steps down the sidewalk from our house. The scene was familiar. Old man with an old bike parked in the same spot and he was resting in the shade. We had never spoken or seen each other. I very much sensed in my heart that God was telling me to share a few of these sandwiches with that man. I said, "You have got to be kidding, God! That is a man and I'm a woman and you really want me to walk down two sandwiches to him?" And He would not let up. I argued for at least 30 minutes but couldn't get away from it. So here I go walking down Main St. at Noon to give this elderly man a sandwich. I hid the sandwiches in my Grandmother’s egg basket in case someone thought I was a nut case. When I got to him I was rather shocked by his piercing blue eyes and said, "Sir, please don't think this is weird because I know it really is but would you like a homemade chicken salad sandwich and a bottle of water?" He said, "I aint got no money." I was so taken back by that and said, "Oh Sir, it's free!" He just started laughing and told me his name and said, "You made that for me?" I said, "Well, not really Sir but I want you to have them if you'd like." He snatched those two sandwiches up and grabbed my arm to pull me closer and that's when I said real fast, "Hope you enjoy!" and I ran ALL the way home. Like the little piggy in the story we tell on our kids’ toes....yeah, I mean ALLLLL the way home I ran. And I still have no idea why God had me do that. But I know He put it on my heart. And I trust He had a reason even if it was just to see if I'd obey Him. I don't always respond in obedience. Many times I don't. But my deepest desire is to venture into the awkward, or whatever it is He calls me to, for the sake of loving others like He loves me. And I'll leave the results up to Him.

So I say all that to say.....as we pray and ask God to show us how He wants us to serve and love others at our church, expect Him to do it. And be prepared that often times it's not in a nice, tidy package like we have pictured in our heads. It can seem awkward, uncomfortable and maybe even weird. But I want to challenge all of us to dare to ask God to speak into our hearts and then to follow through with what He tells us. It will be a beautiful picture of the Body of Christ working in such a way that we say, "Oh, that had to be God!"

Looking back on this now that its been a few weeks I see things differently. At the time I was mortified, argumentative and scared to death. I don’t claim to have handled the situation perfectly or with ease. I was more annoyed by the simple calling than grateful. But I’m in a different place now. I look back on the sandwich man scenario and see that God spoke to me in the midst of the mundane. It was just a regular day in the kitchen at lunch time. And He spoke into my heart. What makes this divine is not necessarily the gift of the sandwiches because I have no idea what those sandwiches meant for that man. But the communion between a girl interested in her own agenda for the day being interrupted by God is what’s divine. God using us when we don’t have anything to offer except what He does in and through us, is divine.

I pray that this post doesn’t seem arrogant. God knows my heart in this and it’s to praise Him for giving us chances to show His love. For equipping us to do what He has called us to do even when we think it’s impossible. To praise Him for answering prayer and for giving courage that isn’t within us. That is my heart in this post. It’s to encourage us all to listen to Him and to respond and to look back at the grace involved in Him using us. And what about Him still using us as even after we stumble the entire way down the street out of pure awkwardness? Yeah, I’d call that something divine.

Just when I was starting to stress about how many church and Christian school things I’m doing and how I don’t have time to be with the people in my community that need to know God, God brings the sandwich man to mind. And He whispers to me, “Keep doing the church stuff and keep listening and be ready for the next mundane turned divine.”

And I’m left wondering if next time I’ll not run away from sandwich man but instead use more words to communicate the love of Christ.

Linking up with Jen and Michelle today.

Front Porch Hair Studio

2011-09-06T11:39:00.001-07:00

Sophie’s big thing right now is doing everybody’s hair. I can’t sit at the computer for five minutes without her sneaking up behind me with a spray bottle, brush and rubber bands. She works hard getting every piece of hair right where it needs to be. Of course I come out practically drenched and with hair sticking to my head and she just laughs with glee at the finished product. So imagine my joy when she picked a new recipient of her hair-handiwork Saturday morning! I love Randy’s expression in the first picture….”grumpy britches”…. but it didn’t last long.

The spray bottle sent MIA for a while but that didn’t stop the hair antics. She just used a baby bottle which worked pretty good.

And I was so glad I captured the tickle/water/zerburt fight in pictures. What a cute series of Daddy’s Girl pics. She has him wrapped, ya’ll. I mean completely wrapped.

40 @ 40

2011-09-02T13:22:00.001-07:00

I’m about to turn into an old lady in less than a week. I remember giving my sister fits when she turned 40 thinking that was the ancient of days. And now here I am. Well, it’s coming up next Sunday. And I want to do something sort of weird for my birthday but I don’t think I have the guts to do it. I want to invite 40 people to church with me that don’t go to our church…..like people I’ve met in our community that either go to other churches or that don’t go to church. I made a hit list and couldn’t come up with 40 people but got close. And some of them I didn’t know very well but still put them down. I keep going back and forth on if I want to do this or not. I’d have to buckle down and figure out if I’m going to go for it or not and whip out a “I don’t know you well but please come to church with me on my 40th birthday and then to our house for Sunday lunch” invitation thingy. And like who would even do that? A freak, that’s who.

It’s weird, I know, but my thoughts behind the idea is that God is a huge part of my life and so are people. I am passionate about God and how He loves us and uses people to accomplish His purposes. And so I figure why not do something centered around both at a birthday that marks an approximate halfway point ( give or take a decade or so) of my life. I know. It’s weird. I’m not even sure why I’m blogging about it. It’s because I can’t get away from the idea. In fact while I was having breakfast with my Mom (she’s up from Atlanta…who-hoo!) this morning a couple came into the bakery that I had on my “40 @ 40” list . It’s an older couple that I run into all around town….coffee shops mainly but other places too. We have always talked and I just really like them a lot. I told my Mom my idea and she thought I should go for it. I talked to the couple I wanted to invite but could.not muster up enough courage to ask them to come to my birthday church service party. Ha! Okay, that sounds so ridiculous. And now you see what I’m going through……one minute I’m all “I’m totally doing this thing!!!!” and the next I’m like “That is absurd. Go get some therapy girl!” Oh well, I’ll keep thinking on it and let you know what ever came of it.

On a more normal note…….

My Mom came up to be with the kids for “Grandparent’s Day” at the school they go to and it was a great day. Grandparents get to go to school with their grandkids and they have special activities and programs. We had so much fun.

Mitchell handed this card to Grandmother and said, “This is a picture of you and the ghost of Grandaddy”. I wasn’t sure if I should cry, laugh or be scared. But it really was sweet because it was his way of thinking of Grandmother. Mitchell knew his Grandaddy well before he passed away. And he knows how much my Mom loved him. I think this was his way of honoring her in a way. I just love that. So so sweet.

I’m trying to talk my Mom into staying for a few more days but don’t know that she will be able to, however, being the baby of the family that I am, I will keep trying. Ha!

Happy Weekend Ya’ll!

UFO’s, Books and Parent’s in PJ’s

2011-08-31T14:14:00.001-07:00

Our small Christian School did its first ever Scholastic Book Fair this week and boy has it been fun! The theme is “Out of this World” and so we had some fun with space themed decorations and such.

My friend Anna is the crazy one picking her nose with the green pointer thingy. I don’t know who that other crazy woman is. So it was Family Night last night. We sent home fliers inviting all the parents and kids to come dressed in their pj’s to watch Wall-e, get free pizza&popcorn and shop the book fair. We had about 125 people come and about 1/4 of the parents showed up in their pajama’s and almost all the kids did.

As life would have it……I realized on my way to the school in my pj’s that the one thing I was supposed to bring: donated bags from the grocery store, I had forgotten! So I parked at the curb at Lowe’s Foods and said a quick prayer that I wouldn’t see anyone I knew and ran in. Immediately, I mean at the front door, I met the son of a sweet widow at our church. I was mortified. He had friends there. When I tried to explain why I was in my pajama’s it just didn’t come out right and I kept talking and talking and talking and looked more foolish than a crazy woman in her pajama’s, pigtails and an alien headband all by her grownup self. It’s one thing to do this with a group of people but when you’re alone, well, that’s just weird. Oh well, I gave up trying to claim “Fundraiser” and went to the manager asking for the bags. The right person wasn’t there and before the cashier got on the phone loud speakering the manager I just begged for the bags so I could get outta there fast. She complied and all was well as I peeled out on two wheels of the Mom-mobile.

My crazy friend pictured above and I made this Space Ship out of a baby pool, spray painted cups, plates and bowls. Randy hung it for us. And we were pretty proud of our creation.

We had these :Recommended by” signs that Scholastic sent us and so when Randy left one afternoon we put his name “Most Reverand Randy” and slapped it up under Captain Underpants. But then I chickened out and threw it away later. Ha! I personally haven’t read these books and was under the impression they were sort of inappropriate and so we pulled them at first, along with some other books, but then after talking with quite a few people I found out they aren’t what I thought they were. If you have read them, I’d love to know your opinion. As far as the book fair we encouraged parents to check out any books they had questions about. We tried to pull out what we knew we didn’t want to promote or endorse as a school but we couldn’t read every single book.

We all agreed that it was just a wonderful night of FUN, promoting reading and working towards building our library. Whoo-hoo Community!

Grappling with Adoption Issues

2011-08-30T10:15:00.001-07:00

It was about two weeks ago while we sat at the dinner table as a family and out of the blue our son said, “Mom, is my step Aunt dead?” I was very interested in who Mitchell thought his “step Aunt” was and asked further questions to see what was going on in that little head of his. Randy and I exchanged confused looks but after getting more information from Mitchell realized he was talking about his birthmother. I said, “No, I don’t think she is, Mitchell, but we don’t really have a way of knowing for sure. I would say she’s still alive.” He said, “Well, she’d be amazed!” We both agreed and told Mitchell that she indeed would be amazed. The next question was,“Will I ever get to see her?” We had never had that conversation before. To this point we have told their adoption stories openly but without many details mainly because we don’t know many details. Some things we wait for them to initiate and ask. Other parts of the story we initiate and talk about. Tonight he was doing all the initiating. It didn’t come as a complete surprise because Mitchell’s Speech Therapist has two adopted children and she explained to me that between the ages of 9-11 are such critical years in a child’s development and adopted children especially grapple with issues of abandonment and rejection. I’ve read this before in books. She told me to be aware of it even if Mitchell never talked about it…. he was most likely thinking about it.

So as Mitchell was talking I was quickly brought back to my conversation with Dr. Bonner. I didn’t feel threatened by the questions but I do have to say I was a bit intimidated. Why, I don’t know. As Mitchell was asking this question of course four year old Sophie chimes in and says, “Will I get to meet the lady whose tummy I grew in too?” WOW! Was this really happening over our spaghetti? I mean I swear we were just talking about whoopie cushions just minutes prior. For some reason I liked that conversation better. Yes, intimidated is how I felt. I still don’t know why. Regardless of my feelings I said what we whole heartedly believe, “When you are old enough, like 18 years old or so, if you would like to try to find your birthmother, Dad and I will help you try to find her so you can meet her.” And then Mitchell says, “Dad, you’ve got something in your hair!” And we were off to a completely different topic. That fast. He was done. His questions were answered and he was satisfied. And we were too.

I’ve done a lot of thinking about this topic of rejection lately. My heart has been overwhelmed at the thought of both our children being born out of complete love but also acknowledging the reality piece of rejection/abandonment in some sense of the word. I hate to use those terms because our children’s birthmothers are heroes in my mind and heart. I don’t think they “rejected” their babies but made a choice out of pure love. But I think we have to look at it for what it is and there is the plain issue of “giving up” and although it’s out of love it’s still a form of rejection.

But the thing I cling to on Mitchell and Sophie’s behalf and am trying to teach them on their level is that there is complete redemption in Jesus Christ. It doesn’t “make up” for rejection or make it magically disappear. But when we live in the reality of God’s complete sufficiency combined with His unconditional love for us is when the loss or rejection doesn’t overcome us. The pain of that loss will most likely still be there and we may feel it more at certain times than others but living through loss while clinging to the sufficiency of Christ colors your world. It turns what could be utter despair and hopelessness into something divine and new. This truth of Christ’s sufficiency stands strong for anyone who believes in Him. It applies to all…..the ones of us who have had an abortion, the ones of us who feel rejected, the ones of us who caused rejection, and yes, even to the ones of us who will inflict future rejection.

Christ’s sufficiency wrapped in grace. Oh I’m so glad to be adopted into that kind of love.

And this kind of love…….

“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” Romans 5:8

So today, with feelings of rejection or of complete adequacy, remember that He loves you and He is sufficient for the very thing in front of you, behind you and for what is to come.

Wife advice from wives of many years

2011-08-25T17:59:00.001-07:00

Sophie and I had some of our sweet friends over from church this week. Two of them have a hard time getting out now and so it was such an honor to have them over for lunch. Sophie stayed home from school to help out and just to be there. She loved reading one of her new library books while I got the plates fixed.

I found these plastic placemats at a consignment store and love them….so girly and frilly. And I love the place card holders a friend gave me a long time ago. Sophie picked the flowers this morning to put in each vase. I guess you notice she wanted to write her own name herself. I should have her make one every year and save it since we do girly lunches a few times during the year.

After Sophie had finished her lunch she was roaming around in the secretary behind her looking for a teacup and found this blue wedge wood dish. I shared the story with the ladies how I used to work for a sweet older lady years ago. She was wealthy and had house help do all the cooking, cleaning, etc and I was hired to be her companion and take her to book clubs, bridge parties, and such. Ms. Lottie and I grew close and her family was so nice to me and Randy. When she died her family told me to pick out something I’d like and so when I saw this wedge wood saucer I chose that because I’d never had any wedge wood before. I was so proud of my pick and when I showed it to my Mom she very quickly pointed out the fact that it was an ash tray! Ha! I had no clue what those indentions were for. I thought maybe you put your lemon slice there or something. Looking back on it I laugh at the thought of all the nice things I could’ve chosen and that’s what I picked. So I set the ash tray down in the center of the table and told them it was there if they needed it. And we all laughed a nice hearty smoker’s laugh. Just Kidding.

I told these sweet older ladies that our Busy Mom’s Night Out group was meeting regularly and that we were going to be talking about wife stuff and if they had any advice to a young wife today what would it be. One lady said, “I don’t have to think about it. Take the time to cook for your man. Show him you love him by taking the time to prepare a home cooked meal for him.” She went on to say that all three of her sons cook. I thought she was going to advise me to teach Mitchell how to cook but she was saying that today’s culture has lost something special when women don’t cook for their families. One of the other ladies piped in and said, “I worked 40 hours a week but you have to eat and your kids do too so you just have to think about it ahead of time and do what you can in the mornings. Meal times are important together and cooking shows your family you care and you love them.” I was starting to feel guilty although I’ve gotten better at cooking more at home the last few months. I was surprised that they all worked and still cooked every night. Because that was my defense for working Moms. But these ladies worked too. And 40 hours is 40 hours.

I was sweating bullets at this point as I reached across to serve the store bought lemon poppy seed bread. Nobody had asked me if I had made anything yet and I was real glad. But then it happened.

I was asked if I made the soup. Sophie looked at me and I sheepishly explained that I picked it up. And then the origins of the lemon poppy seed had to come up as well and I had to confess I bought that as well. One lady held up her sandwich and said, “Well, I know you made this and it’s delicious!” Saved by the chicken salad…. or at least I hope so. Never did I feel condemned or looked down on by these sweet ladies. But I could tell they felt very strongly about this issue of cooking for your family regularly and having meal time together. And it was actually really good for me to hear. I’m still grappling with these issues and why it’s so different today than back then. When my Mother says things like, “I would never have dreamed of asking your father to keep you kids, ever.” I’m like, “Why the heck not???!!!! You deserved a break after being with me all flippin’ day long.” My father was a wonderful Dad and was trusted by my Mother so it wasn’t an issue of her being afraid to leave me with him. She did leave me once with him and that’s a hilarious story which maybe I’ll tell one day. Anyways, I sense that many others in this generation feel the same way about keeping house, cooking, kid stuff, etc. They just would never dream of the man doing anything other than providing through his work. And I wonder if it’s legit that things are different today or are we young women missing some things on the home front.

What are your thoughts on women today in regards to cooking at home during the week and eating as a family? Why do you think this has changed and if you try to still cook at home what are some good tips for the rest of us to keep in mind if we’re trying to manage this area better. Would so love your thoughts on this. I’ll share my thoughts in the comments too.

Celebrating Fruit

2011-08-24T05:26:00.001-07:00

We were driving on our way to church Sunday night and out of the blue Mitchell said, “Mom, I want to have Mrs. Perdue and her Mom over for dinner.” This was new for him….initiating having adults over instead of asking for a friend to come over. I thought this was rather strange since he’s never met his Sunday School teacher’s Mother before. He knows she’s blind because I am sure they have prayed for her in Sunday School. Mrs. Perdue is a strong woman of prayer. She’s the prayer warrior you want interceding for you when you need it most. I was touched by Mitchell’s request but still had to ask him what made him think of that and why he wanted to ask them over. He didn’t have to think long. He said matter of factly, “To comfort her.” I was moved by his response and felt bad for wondering if there was an ulterior motive.

I’ve thought a lot about Mitchell’s request. It’s been a hugely busy week and next week is even crazier. Busy doing ministry stuff. People stuff. Good stuff. Stuff I know God has called us to do. But He has put something on Mitchell’s heart and I don’t want to get in the way of that. I pray regularly that the Spirit of God will move in Mitchell’s heart and lead him personally. And when He does I want to help facilitate obedience as best as I can. I want to recognize and acknowledge the fact that God is working in Mitchell’s heart. I am so thankful to see the fruit of the Holy Spirit come through Mitchell in this way. It’s awesome and exciting to watch my son minister to others. Not because he’s a “Preacher’s Kid” but because He’s a Christian who is being sensitive to the Holy Spirit. It thrills me to see this. I’ve explained to Mitchell that we will talk to Mrs. Perdue together to see if she thinks her Mother can do an outing like this and if so we will do it. If not, we will comfort her with our continued prayers.

I hesitate to make a post like this because it sounds all braggy about my kid and tomorrow he’ll probably punch someone in line or say a new cuss word. Because that’s just how it usually happens. I’m serious. Like the potty mouth incident while we were talking to our church about potentially moving up there to accept the position of pastoring the church. But oh well, such is the life of learning and growing. In fact if my son were blogging about me he’d tell you that I fixed a table for four sweet older ladies coming for lunch tomorrow but I got frustrated and short tempered (pastor’s wife code for: I yelled) at Sophie as I was doing it. Brought her to tears. Had to apologize and admit that the words that came through my lips were not kindness. The words were accurate but the way I said them was wrong. So we’re all learning and growing around here. We take some steps backwards and only in His grace do we ever take some forward. And the same is true for you and your children if you/they have a relationship with Him. Look for those positive steps forward in both you and your kids and celebrate the heck out of them!

Moved by the Movies

2011-08-22T11:47:00.001-07:00

It was Saturday late afternoon and I had a hankering to go see a chick flick. I put it out on my facebook and texted a few people and we gathered 10 of us to go see “The Help” down in Greensboro. Dinner was quick but fun at Jason’s Deli and the drama for the night was when we got a talkin’ to by a police officer for playing around with a microphone thingy in the middle of the theatre foyer. But I really don’t know what he said because I left everyone high and dry and ran and hid behind the claw grabbing, toy machine thing. I know that was bad but it was my first instinct …..to run and hide……thank you great great great…. Grandma/ Grandpa Adam and Eve. Well, we finally made it to the third row of the theatre seating because the place was packed. I hadn’t sat that close in a theatre since I was like seven years old when you think the closer the better. But we had no other choice. Turned out just fine though. The movie was an incredible story and one that gave me a new understanding and perspective of what some of our black community went through. Maybe you’ve read the book. If you did you will realize the book had much less bad language in it than the movie. Yeah, leave it to me to pick the movies with bad language to take a group of church ladies to go see. The write up I read said that it was rated PG-13 for “thematic” reasons and I assumed it was based on the whole racial thing. Nope. It had everything to do with the language. Other than that it was a wonderful movie.

My favorite part of the movie is when Aibileen, (the black cook, nanny and maid: “the help”) would take the sweet toddler she was caring for every single day and hold her and look her in the eyes and say in the most nurturing way, “You is kind (dramatic pause) You is smart (another dramatic pause) You is important.” I think I cried every time she said it in the movie because it was just so very sweet and affirming to this little girl who was getting overlooked by her aristocratic Mother. It touched me so much that I thought I’d try it out on Sophie as I put her to bed last night. I even said it just like Aibileen. Ha, I’m kind of laughing at that thought because why would I do that? That’s just weird. Anyways, I did. I said it slow and pronounced each word just like Aibileen as I was tucking Sophie in bed. She shook her head in the affirmative after every word I said as if she already knew these things but was soaking up each word. I got the the last part of telling her she was important and without skipping a beat and in perfect cadence she said, “And you loves me.”

And I thought I was going to melt with her little arms wrapped around my neck.

And this fictional character got me thinking about the power of positive words and affirmation. Sometimes we tend to baulk at those words because they sound Godless and man centered but how often we are told in scripture to encourage others and to bless others. How words aptly spoken are like apples of gold. I’m still not sure I get that one. I’ve never really wanted to eat a gold apple before but maybe it’s talking about the worth of gold and if gold was as common as apples on a tree then how rich we’d all be. And how rich in our souls we’d be if we regularly spoke words that uplift and encourage each other.

Yes, I want to be that girl. The one whose speech is seasoned with grace. Not flattery. No, not that. But one who is willing to speak the truth in love. One who speaks life into her children even when I don’t feel like it. Just like Aibileen…..on her way out the door of being falsely accused and fired....she took the time to speak life over a child she grew to love.

And I’m about to cry right now. Because I is lovin’ this movie!!!!!

Linking up with Jen today because I just love her blog, her spirit and her awesome community of bloggers.